She’s a sheltie?

You know, I’m always worried that going too far with the makeup and hair and pushup bra just ages me... and I think I’m right. When this 18 year-old looks 30, I can’t imagine how sad I would look.

This is definitely going to hurt his chances in the 2020 election.

I lost it on a lady once when she harangued me for 20 minutes about why we don’t have white Zinfandel, what kind of place is this, do I even know what that is (lol). We have a small but well cultivated wine list, and I tried as hardnas I could to steer her toward a drink she might enjoy, but she wasn’t having any of…

When I managed a Borders we were also responsible for this small calendar kiosk on the other side of the shopping center. I was there covering someone’s lunch break and this crazed woman came over demanding why we had no bichon frise calendars. The dog calendar people were always the weirdest.

Ah I know its cliche to want a tree planted over your dead body, but now I want a tree planted over my body so that in couple hundred years maybe my skeleton can scare someone when the tree falls over.

actually they are muslims, but the acid attacks have nothing to do with islam. it happens at equal rates to Hindu girls in India, and in most third world countries. The fact that acid can be so easily bought in India and of course the misogyny makes it even worse

Being simultaneously horrified and filled with admiration is a strange feeling. I’m sorry for and proud of her, all at once.

Holy shit, that girl is so strong and brave. That situation is horrifying.

This is really sub-par trolling. And it’s past your bedtime.

That’s not weird. Weird is wanting to see the matrix redone with cats.

They never took a doggie bag home and they never touched Golem Jesus’s meal.

My Jewish parents attended mass given at the Vatican by Pope John Paul II. I asked why, and my dad told me he was hungry and wanted the cracker.

I’m sure everyone else has a better one, but this is my best shot:

Something tells me that the state’s lawyers has no clue how medical coding works, and decided that since these providers take Medicaid, they would also use the codes that are used by clinics like Planned Parenthood, without bothering to check.

no. see. my mother in law and I had this conversation. She worries about me educating my daughters about sex. I asked why, and she hemmed and hawed and finally said that the more information kids get about it, isn’t that like giving them permission? Handing out condoms is basically condoning sex? and I just looked at…

Ah, but consider: she’s even better qualified to express opinions on Iran than she was on Russia; and without benefit of being able to see it from her house, either.

But not more than 6,000 years, right?

Why do I feel compelled to apologize on behalf of Alaska every time this idiot publicly word vomits?