Did you trade a walk-on part in the war, for a lead role in a cage?

Ah, but see if you go to Sendik’s you don’t have a free delivery problem.

Just go to Sendik’s.

How much you want to bet that the cashier wasn’t actually in the middle of anything important?

What if I’m going as a black hole?

This is the thing that way too many people conveniently ignore:  the fact that you’re literally spending tens of thousands of dollars on something that you’ve never actually tried out?!  Yeah, no way am I doing the online car buying thing until they’ve created a process by which I can do a real test drive and do the…

The first dog looks like he’s in excellent shape for being a “wild” dog.  Look how clean he is and his shiny coat.  My guess is there’s a family somewhere nearby that takes care of him and he wanders around the ruins copping snacks all day.

If it makes you feel any better, just remember that the GB D allowed Matt Moore to hang 24 on them.  If Mahomes had been playing, he would have steamrolled them into something like 41-31.

Now that the New and Improved Defense allowed a 3rd rate QB to hang 24 points on them, I’m really hoping that the sports press will, for the love of God, stop gushing so much about that bunch of frauds. The GB D has sucked for ages and just because they have provided a nominal amount of improvement doesn’t mean that…

During the Al Franken mess, I warned every single Jezie that if an accusation was all that was required to destroy someone’s political career, then it was only going to be a matter of time before Democratic women became a target. Funny how quickly they turn to the exact same defense that defenders of Franken used when…

He looks a lot like this “German” wrestler from the 70's.  Baron von something or other.  His signature move was The Claw.

Does your gas utility offer budget billing, where you pay the same amount every month? That’s saved us in a couple of places where we’ve lived.

Bottom line is: Practice makes better. I’ve been doing this for decades and the more I do it, the more comfortable I get. I’ve helped a few people with major public speaking anxiety—one guy was shaking so badly that he literally spilled his water when I poured him a glass to take a minute to calm down. Practice,…

I always used “practice makes better.”  It’s true, it gets the kids’ attention because it’s not what they typically hear, and it’s attainable.

This shit, right here, is how we wind up with NFL players who beat and rape and kill and steal. They’ve been given a pass since they were kids because they could play a fucking game, so they’ve never had to incur the consequences of their actions. “Oh, we can’t have junior sit out his suspension—we need him for the…

You’re fine, Torch. I do this—honestly, more frequently that you’d think—whenever I come across a car that doesn’t have the hood completely latched down. I was riding in a friend’s ‘65 Mustang when we realized the hood wasn’t all the way down and before we could pull over, the damned thing popped up and caused all…

It’s the lines.

OMG! Are you telling me that my Artisan, Free-Range, Organic, Non-GMO, Vegan, Locally Sourced Hot Pockets are NOT HEALTHY FOR MY LITTLE ANGEL?!

He also made the 350 mark faster than any QB in the history of the NFL.

Correct.  Which is the whole point.