I would watch him in a new age Dan Connor type role with a badass Roseanne type wife. Los of plaid and Bud lights.

I can’t get perversion to stay on my eyelashes :(

I will only be surprised if the one with the highlights gets married. Because highlights.

OMG they are so are. I really want to see them drive around LA on their shitty date while thought bubbles come up

wat. how?

I was thinking maybe a new Michael Chabon character. “The Adventures of Beckeld and Clay as they escape the gentrification of Brooklyn.”

assholes. that’s who.

maybe we are in a time loop

Yeah man what matters is under the hood and it’s all the same in the dark right? As long as no fatties?

I think he has 90s face, maybe this is an old picture or the lighting is off but it’s just not......recent? relevant?

business casual because it’s business time

People are seriously dumb. Any device that “learns more” the longer you have it is learning for a reason. 

I think he would be better looking if he wasn’t making an “I’m sorry I’m the ugly one” expression. But I also have a thing for skinny white guys.

A hard 30. maybe she used to smoke a pack a day while lying by the pool with no sunscreen. Not that there’s anything wrong with that!

Maybe we should start a kickstarter to buy him a belt.

I feel like he’s still trying to convince himself he likes her. Like oh yeah, she’s totally beautiful, right Chad? I can marry her? You guys won’t laugh at me?

I went to shirtless guys website (ahem he’s a doctor get in line!!!) and not only can he play the violin without a shirt but he can also stand near piles of books without a shirt too! So fucking talented. And also his butt does not look good in those pants.

Probably because she’s too busy learning more languages

I’m hoping one of the hot laydeez Dan Rothkind dated before settling with his soft, elegant fiancee writes a rebuttal about why she isn’t dating boring finance bros with dad bods and receding hairlines anymore.

Yeah I thought the 23 year old (was she wearing a prom dress in that pic?) was sexy euro nerd guys girl he was settling for