I guess no hotties out there becoming a late in life flute player

nopenopenope

yasss

dangit that was going to be me!!! Can I at least keep the sequin shorts?

I guess I’ll be the one grinding on that guys crotch while he checks his phone. Seems true to life.

bleeeeeeech

Ugh that is the worst-time to update your resume with *has never been a model, no that is not me

Yikes those are terrible, is Nivea backed by the Aryan nation?

So would you say she’s dating Johnnie Walker?

windbreakers are so hot right now.

I haven’t googled my name with hot on the end yet but usually I get a picture of my cousin (who is a different gender) and a picture of my friend who has a completely different name. Apparently I keep my shit locked down.

I pretty much hated that movie but your description is spot on. She was really good I just cannot handle 3 hour long drone fests.

Ooh I (somehow) haven’t seen that yet. I’m glad she hasn’t botoxed her face into oblivion.

I feel like I need more info about how she has. not. aged.

I would of course drink Rose with Martha but not if she is going to offer it with her creepy looking hand in the top photo.

I actually really like the black one. Not sure I’d wear it but I appreciate its vibe of trustafarian yoga on the beach in Bali instagramming 24/7.

Geez no of course don’t let your toddler ride in the car without a car seat! Where the fuck would they sit? Front seat with a seatbelt choking them?

Ugh he looks like every emo Canadian guy ever

I am giggling so hard at this comment!

I describe mine as a Krusty-o making its way out of my uterus