but did Daya list Pornstache as the father on the birth certificate?

I guess I'm going to have to update my rankings of Piper's Terrible Deeds. The new top seven:
1. Frames her girlfriend two days before she's to be released, extending her sentence and getting her sent to Max.
2. Gets Alex sent back to prison, endangering her life.
3. Steals the cell phone that Blanca used to sex…

I think I remember seeing Blanca walk by in the background during one of the scenes Pennsatucky had in psych. This was after she got hauled away for freaking out when Piper stole her cell phone.

well, she does get donuts now.

yeah, that's what I was thinking. The only way she'd get caught for that is if she went out of her way to confess, which doesn't really seem in character. I don't know what kind of facial expression can communicate "I just pushed a guy off a cliff, follow me to find his body."

I have to agree with everyone else that Flaca was definitely disappointed that the new job was sewing. It's not a crushing tragedy-she's still earning way more money than all the other inmates-but I think there's a lot of regret and the irony of the situation is not lost on her. I think the episode is pretty clear…

she didn't get called away right after she hid the box in her drawer, it was one of those fake scare thing that horror movies do. The knock on the door that we think is Doug was actually her boarding house-mates inviting her to a celebration. Doug kidnaps her when she's leaving her job at the store.

Well, between spending half the episode showing a murder in New Mexico and Francis's Walter White impression with Claire at the end, it's pretty clear that the writers finally finished watching Breaking Bad.

"He speaks out of love for his friend. Perhaps that love in his heart is God."
How convenient, a theory about God that doesn't require looking through a telescope. Get back to work!"

It seems that nobody is that keen to throw Bennet in jail. He full on confessed to the relationship to Caputo, who just tried to sweep everything under the rugs. Once he quits working as a corrections officer, he's out of the spotlight and I feel like nobody would care what he's doing. Think about all the other…

I think she was insulting Ms. Stach's kids for negotiating purposes. Inside she was probably thinking "hot damn, more rich 'relatives'". But I do think it's funny that everyone in the show seems to be taking Pornstache's mother's account of her other kids at face value. Couldn't she just be as delusional/full of shit…

in fairness, I think his intent in that situation was to get Aleida into a place where Daya could confront her.
I found this last episode to be one of the less annoying Daya-Bennet episodes, but that's not saying much. I feel like the obvious solution of him quitting his job as a corrections officer is never, ever…

I'm sure Taystee and Poussey would've gladly gone through every book with a disinfectant spray in hand if it meant saving the library. It's not like they lack time

I felt that the first episode from last season was even worse in that respect. It wasn't until I watched the second episode, with Taystee and Co, that I remembered how much I enjoyed this show.

If I remember correctly, her store was hiding corpses in their freezer, which was implied how they were paying off the broken implant debt. I always assumed Red got caught with that, but I suppose it was never spelled out.

so you mean the mo' movies he makes, the Mohican drink?

Catching up on Netflix.

I'm not sure Loretta knew that Barney was a serial womanizer afraid of commitment. It's a relationship based on believing each others' preposterous lies. For example, Barney did that thing where he hired actors to pretend to be his "family" for Loretta's sake.

she was also a shitty kindergarten teacher, what with all the late nights at McClaren's, losing control of her class to the point where they tied her up and made hostage demands, and I think there was one time she just abandoned her class to run somewhere in New York.

Was anything else kind of worried after Orrin mentioned a dad that the camera would pan over to a dead body?