But I don't give a fuck about the ennui of rich people.

And, as Americans (at least the left-leaning ones) tend to do in times of crisis, we’re turning to Jon Stewart for answers.

I'd hope that proves unnecessary.

I don't see material analysis here. I see eagerness to justify your scrupulousness with a facade of class consciousness. And yeah, you kind of need other people to back you on the left thing - that's actually the basis of the analysis you're feigning but failing to perform.

I'm not interested in converting class enemies.

Democrats have totally lost sight of the left, to the extent that they consider Bernie Sanders to represent the left. He doesn't. He's at best a left-wing liberal, and his voters are going to be driven right out of the Democrats into the left.

The left will surge, I have no doubt of that, and it's going to knock the Democrats right over like the center-right party they are. What Democrats don't get is that they've lost the left: the left now views the Democrats as its opponents.

I'm saying that your path through those states didn't happen, so the strategy you're endorsing is in the historical graveyard now.

Wow, a self-proclaimed leftist who explains that he's not one of those "bad" leftists, yeah, you're really helping the cause there dude.

Who the fuck cares what you think, though?

You do realize that the argument to pick someone who won in those states in the primary is the idea that they'll win them in the general, right?

Because tests for voting are some Deep South Jim Crow shit. Tell your dad that before he starts spouting that bullshit off anywhere else.

It's not worthwhile to blame John Oliver for anything. He's just a prick.

Those sorts of exams have also historically been used to disenfranchise black voters.

It's also what Donald Trump endorses doing, for whatever that's worth.

At this point, I feel like I'd just be getting in your way on that count.

This is a hot story from 2008, 2010, 2012 even… 2016, though, no. Everyone knows this already. Now it's just a brute club to attack people who disagree with you.

And I'm really happy for MANIMAL, and I'mma let him finish, but I want to know how that happened for real.

Thanks to this interview, I enjoyed for a few seconds the second-order fantasy of Billy Bob Thornton sitting around fantasizing that everyone who asks him for an autograph has only had sex in the missionary position, albeit at an indefatigable rhythm as soon as they get home from any outing.

How did this suddenly become the most read article on the site a week and a half after this feature ended? Did you wait until November 10th to post your "It's Halloween" story on Facebook?