Back in ‘89 Ford simply slid into place

I have purchased a new vehicle 3 times in the last 5 years. When factoring in all final concerns including interest on the financing the used cars were more expensive. 

Didn’t you do a write up on the differences? Can you provide a link? I know it was a while back,  it was insightful. 

Pole dances from Peter Dinklage. No judgement from me. I mean... if you have money to spend, spend it well, right?

Alternative spending theory has defaulted to hookers and cocaine or (slow car + driven fast)X. There must be better answers. Heroine and happy endings? Ponies and pixie sticks? Meth and Marmite? Lap dances from little people? 

Thanks for being a killjoy. I just realized I fucked up the cinnamon rolls I put in the oven by not actually adding the goddamn cinnamon and now this. Reality is a cruel mistress.

Shit. I’m dealing with that on an overseas project. Engineer, “the scope didn’t indicate the need for linear attenuation.” Me, “You’re correct, but it is industry standard best practice to utilize linear attenuation. Why wouldn’t it be linear? The fucking interface can’t even accommodate a logarithmic change.”

Settle down, you’re both correct.

I truly admire your contributions to lawn mower culture. We, as lawn mowerers, are forever grateful for your innovations.

Did you know that Teslas are completely autonomous vehicles that, when equipped with Tweels from Michelin, will also never require maintenance of any sort? In fact the tires will replace themselves with regenerative braking.

Maybe your cousin would make more money if he could actually ski.

This is the most correct answer and gif. I would star you, but kinja won’t let me star from my phone and hasn’t for a long time.

But you have really low taxes

It does, my point is that it is getting difficult to get a vehicle that has good safety tech and ratings, without bullshit technology that auto companies are not good at developing. When I bought a vehicle that was as close as I could find to my desires it was a real pain in the ass to buy new. I will attest the fact…

I bought the closest I could find and fit in at the time, which was a manual forester. It’s kinda fun (ish?), but a bit under powered. 

A sand rail.

I have to be honest, the only technology I truly care about is advancements in structural technology and airbag deployments that increase crash survival. I would gladly take a completely stripped vehicle that was cheap, fun, safe, and otherwise completely stripped, but it doesn’t seem to exist. Manufacturers lament…

Move your friend’s couch then take it to the local jump trail. Tail whips for days.

This is a good answer. My biggest issue with automatics is the feeling of disconnect from the petal modulation to the throttle to the momentum of the car. 

Oooh, the shit I could build with the shit we get rid of on the job sites I work on.