If anybody in baseball would know the best restaurants in the league, it would be Matt Harvey. He grew a gullet during his painstaking research. Hopefully he’s developed better control at the urinal over these past few months than he exhibits on the mound, as out there, he’s pissing all over the Mets’ season.

Dipshit Deadspin Hipsters vs. Douchebag Fist-Pumpin’ Bros, Battle No. 1258. When the fuck will that meteor get here?

Almonds are Satan. Meat is awesome and tasty.

No. Outlaw almonds, instead.

Libel. Like every other Friday.

I wonder if any of those 50 lbs. or so he’s gained since breking into the majors might be at fault. Oh well, I’m sure he and Bartolo destroyed the postgame spread, regardless.

She did just ask to be interviewed. It may well be some narcissistic shit. It’s also how a not-small percentage of interviews are sparked.

I always thought those sandwiches looked delicious as we fly over you to get to places that are worth it.

The IOC has always been accused of being a collection of pinheads. As it turns out, all they really want is to be like you and me ...