They’re actually looking through his crotch, at his wallet in his back pocket. Like Superman, except hoes. I believe the prophet Soulja Boy wrote of this 

chris you sound like my girlfriend talking about me

Show, don’t tell.

“In my dying breath I cast Self-Revive!” “There’s a Mist of Occlusion in the pit.” “Bullshit there is!”

I never quite understood why women risk their lives by wearing revealing and sexy clothing out on the town on Saturday nights. I get it, it’s your right, but knowing how men are, you’re basically asking for it. I used to see twenty-something women at clubs in the Meatpacking District in New York where predatory men…

This story is so wild you could knock me over like I was a geriatric paraplegic security guard.

Project Fi Family plan here.

Here’s my Project Fi monthly service charges starting June 2017 and every month going forward. This price includes taxes. $20.11, $17.83, $17.41, $17.75, $17.50, $17.95, $17.59, $2.55, $2.82, & $17.81. The $17.95 charge included being in Italy during this billing period and I used my phone exclusively and extensively,…

Don’t forget Project Fi from Google - $20 for calls and texts, $10 per GB (expensive), but you pay only for what you use, and get free data after 6 GB. Switches automatically between TMobile, Sprint, and US Cellular. Only caveat is the device list is very limited (Recent Google phones and a few tablets.) I’m almost…

pffft. Project Fi

Sorry, this is kinda OT, but the Dumbledore Gif triggered me. Why didn’t Dumbledore teach Harry and co any of the dope spells? And why didn’t Harry use Snape’s combat spells in the Battle of Hogawarts? I’ve been going though the whole series again and i’m still baffled as to why they never learned anything useful. Yes…

People’s resilience and ability to not be physically harmed by words is not a reason to perpetuate demeaning and hateful expressions, even if they’ve lost some of that ugliness over time. I get what you’re saying here (they’re only words, right?), but this concept of “people just shouldn’t take it the wrong way” is…

Now we’re just gonna pee on this little tree here and this little tree here and hey, this little tree here. Because we’re all good boys.

I bet he pleated with them to reconsider.

For a second I thought Kevin Hart had made it onto the stage.

This is the awning of the age of hilarious.

Yeah, but

I was so ready to be snarky about the Aflac duck thing, but I have to admit after reading it seems really sweet and now I’m kinda misty eyed and its actually really cool that they are donating these to kids with cancer. Damn you, Aflac!

We offered to cover them up or change,

“It’s funny to hear a female write about concussions.”