Well it wasn’t me behind the wheel, but I was standing 20 feet away from the car when it came to a stop. Some friends and I had a Mercury Topaz “woods beater” that we uh, beat on in the woods like a forsaken rally car. One nice summer day, a couple of kids who I don’t even think were 16 took it for a spin. We were…

I, for one, welcome our new robot overlords.

Next year’s header image for the Raiders WYTS, which will definitely happen because Drew is unkillable.

Gruden’s moving into “weather map of tornado activity in Kansas” redness territory.

As an American that has lived in China for the last 4 years, this article gave me flashbacks to the many instances of “chabuduo” that I have experienced during that time. I love this country (well, the people and the culture, not the government), but god damn do they know how to scare the shit out of you. I beg your…

Full disclosure, too: Patrick and Ballaban waited until I was home to tell me about this email, which was a great call, and I wrote the narrative of this story on the plane back, so I wasn’t ANGRY WRITING this—it was a later addition.

I’M SCREAMING. A professional PR rep actually said this to y’all?!? The hell? That is so freaking condescending that I would’ve crop-dusted the entire place and left early.

The same representative assured my bosses everything was fine, and said that while the briefing mentioned FIA requirements like a HANS device, Geely didn’t think we needed one because of speeds.

Still only the 2nd most impressive rise from the dead today:

I really wanted to not like this, but I enjoyed it. I don’t think it looks nearly as good, I don’t think Harbour is as good as Perlman so far, but I am willing to give it enough of a chance to prove me wrong.

black guy from the suburbs with a long history of explaining stuff: it essentially means ‘this is your last chance to tell me that you are from my neighborhood or a member of my same clique or a clique that i am cool with; if so, then it would be unacceptable for me to beat the shit out of you, as i am planning on…

In general, when there’s a confrontation and someone asks “where you from?” it is a BAD SIGN.

BUY A DEER AND RIDE IT AS A SHOW OF DOMINANCE TO OTHER DEER

There is exactly a 0% chance that not a SINGLE Marvel show made it onto that list.  Especially considering I haven’t even heard of the #1 show, I’m calling BS.

WHO IS DRIVING? BEAR IS DRIVING. HOW CAN THIS BE?

Man NASCAR is getting weird with sponsors...

Vanity plates are a great way to put something fun on your car and spend, at minimum, eleven months regretting what you requested at the DMV.

The speculation is that it is indeed his funbag that is the reason he’s on medical leave

Oh god...it might be WEEKS before he returns. Dark times, indeed.

The egregious and terrible nature of the core take here almost distracts from the absolutely heinous addendum about the best kind of pizza.