This is an elite response.

Blue and red.

I have that effect on people.

You ate her butt right there, in the stands?

Meh. His hand isn’t even deep enough to be playing with her butthole.

C’mon Deadspin, stick to sports!

Does this mean Romo is not elite?

Does it ever end?

That bird is wearing shorts.

I would support this. Heck, I would support a weekly sad jags feature. Or even a weekly sad NFL team X feature. Make this happen!!!!!!

No shame. I wear my name in tribute to Deadspins bestest writer/food pornographer

Not so fast.

Tends to go in and out, in and out, in and out, eh?

After the big upset of #1 UCF, did they engage in any symbolic burials? Besides their chances at the playoff?

I paid for a SUBSCRIPTION.

My cousin’s greatest accomplishment in life through the age of 25-ish was winning the super bowl with the Seahawks. Tecmo super bowl, that is. With that win, he’d won the game with every team.

I remember you from the Daily Illini!

Did the enterprise thrust in and out of the mouth of the beast?

People party that much at Disney world?’

Woo hoo!!!!