The trailer struck me as meh but I would pay good money to see your pee show. Is that wrong?

I’d rather pass a kidney stone in the form of a flaming porcupine out of my penis, pour gasoline on the porcupine and shove it back in again while drinking a Bud light lime laced with arsenic and rat feces.

Shoot. The benchmark is likely more like dozens, and even then they might not be believed. Look at the Cosby case. Even fifty women haven’t convinced some people. Because when it comes down to it, some men will fundamentally never believe 1. that sexual assault occurs or 2. that women are telling the truth.

That was my thought exactly - that Megan Kelly hasn’t said anything bc she probably got the worst of it. Roger is probably scrubbing her bathroom floor with his tongue AND writing a big fat settlement check.

Oh, c’mon. Would it really surprise anyone if it turns out he’s been harassing the hell outta Miz Kelly for ages, and he’s sweating his diaper wondering if she’ll spill the beans? Sheeeit. They’re probably negotiating her hush money figure as we sit here typing.

Oh hell yeah. I’m 10 years older than her and I have better skin, especially on my forehead. I think you are correct, the wafting cloud of perfection she floats on, makes us think everything about her must be also perfect. Take a look at some closeups:

Well, regardless if she said it or not, I fully believe Gwyneth Paltrow is probably the most insufferable, phony woman alive right now.

Is Kelsey Grammer okay? Radar doesn’t seem to think so!

When Gwyneth Paltrow stabs you in the back, she does it with a locally-sourced, fair trade knife made of cruelty-free recycled metal that hasn’t been tested on animals.

EEEEEEEEEE that baby is the cutest, I would never leave him and would end up dying there, but it would be worth it!!

Next time, Miles should go to a professional colorist instead of buying up all the Jolen bleach at his local CVS.

Oh. My. God.

I didn’t think it was possible for Miles Teller to look even more douchey, but he’s accomplished it.

She says Gwyneth was known as a backstabber before she was known for goopy stuff like cupping.

Why should a man in his 40s pretend to give a shit about Taylor Swift? And then why would he be upset about anyone knowing he doesn't give a shit?

Would have loved it more if he was never on script to start with. They’re all attention seeking children.

Why are we team “dude whining about his breakup with a famous person on a public platform?” He just sounds annoying.

Jesus, Calvin! Your contract with Taylor ended and she signed a new contract with a more famous celebrity. Time to move on.

I just don’t see how you could possibly provide this service. A breakup box should consist of gin, old photographs, any remaining items of his in your home, and scissors. I don’t need you to send me what I definitely already have in my possession.

Was it one filled with food, because food is pretty common, and flowers or plants.