I feel like we haven't had a non-rough news day in quite some time.

Pitino might actually want to watch the film and take some notes given that Savannah State was able to hold out for 15 minutes before scoring.

Let this be a warning to all adult NFL hecklers. Stick to the ESPN.com comment section if you want to keep your caps on.

After the game, Dan Orlovsky, Keary Colbert and Rod Marinelli broke out the champagne.

Detroit mayor: "Hooray, what a glorious day! Our troubles are over! Those big city boys have come to the rescue!"

i had almost forgotten about nickleback. and this is how you remind me.

Why didn't you stop the interview by biting his dick off?

"But it went way too far, and it wasn't very clear that it was a joke, that it was fabricated. If you read it, you might think that it was actually Tiger talking. The whole thing is completely ridiculous."

I was in the stands throwing popcorn.

Yah. But I haven't been able to penetrate that group.

And now everyone is going in on RG3. Steve Young is going in... A radio station listener who won a contest to write for the local CBS station (this is something that happened) is going in... Fucking Pat White is going in!

If this was a crime, they really pulled it off.

But, still, you can (and should) hate the NFL power structure and un-serious disciplinary record but also think this decision is the right decision. Strategic or not (and yes, it is) I still think Peterson being told he's basically a scum-bucket child-abuser who needs to show some damned understanding and real…

I did once see a workhorse evolved into a jackass.

Rosenbloom on Rose: Bloom is off Rose

We now have a super-villain as our Governor because Democrats in Chicago couldn't be bothered to show up to the polls. In the same state that voted OVERWHELMINGLY to increase the minimum wage, they voted for Bruce Fucking Rauner to be governor. Cognitive dissonance anyone?

This is the first documented case of an old person moving from Tampa Bay to Chicago.

I look forward to the follow-up stories from guys caught masturbating in their offices at work after reading Kylie's.

Damn, man, this whole "don't eat shit in New York" thing is gonna be hell on Guy's American Kitchen & Bar.