Et tu, Moute?

Actual serious question: How much do Philly cops make that they can afford bottle service?

I’m not sure about civil service laws.. but I think putting the off-duty cops out of commission automatically makes McCoy and crew new cops, which means no matter how much videotape surfaces, they’ll never be indicted.

Anchor Julie Stewart-Binks suggested he should dance for her.

Oh, are they? I hadn’t heard. They should try advertising that a little.

Which one is the best drink while to watching Key and Peele Livestream GameDay this Sunday?

I knew I shouldn’t have stapled all of that haunted bologna to that Bible and taught it how to speak. I am sorry everyone.

Goddamn, that’s a ritzy neighborhood.

And we don’t even have hands!!!

Don Shula’s a miserable asshole, and his steakhouses suck. Fuck him.

It’s a square, what difference would a sideways insertion make?

It’s like that “women talk more than men” thing, where men somehow get the impression that women dominate a conversation when really they only talk 20% as much men, or whatever that study showed. Or guys who scream that there’s “pay equality” already.

For guys that have to wear suits regularly, I can totally see this. The difference between a decent suit and cheap suit is startling, and if you’re in a suit required industry, you better have good suits. On the other hand, I’m wearing BR pants that I got on sale and a Kate Spade button down I got at a consignment…

The same could be said about the entire state of Utah

Tom, this is what government folks refer to as a “superfund.”

I could raise more money from Columbus residents to keep the Browns out of the city.

Shhhhhuttutppfmm , shhttuuupid.

The major question, of course, is whether L.A. has enough apathy to support two teams rather than just one.

Grease prepared me for regularly seeing 30 year olds playing high school students.

This is why I thought his unceremonious death in “Executive Decision” was so hilarious. The damn movie has his name in big giant letters all over it and he gets like three minutes of screen time before he gets whacked.