Hey guys, if a medical procedure exists you are obligated and compelled to go get that procedure done on the regular. I'm on my fourth appendectomy, I wish the Republicans would just outlaw all surgery to save me from myself. Then maybe I'd finally have the free time to just get pregnant and make my husband dinner.

Off topic, but this scene irritated the shit out of me. It's a state of the art medical device on a ship that's carrying a coed crew (and wasn't it in Charlize Theron's private quarters, or am I misremembering?), but it's not calibrated for women? Why?

I like that the guy who wants to be President thinks that "like a college paper" is some overdemanding, super-rigorous standard.

Clearly they felt their life was in serious danger from the lone teenage girl standing there knocking on their door.

I once went with a group of ghost hunters to some local bar/club that was supposedly haunted. This was for a tv production class in college, so it was me and a couple other students. The ghost hunters put tape recorders all over the place and then we all walked around with cameras waiting for ghosts to communicate…

Yeah, now that she doesn't have the whole "underage Christian BUT LOVES SEX who married a marginally famous fifty-year-old BECAUSE SEX while being sixteen GUYS SHE IS SO SEXUAL SEX" angle, she's going to have a harder time distinguishing herself from all the other over-18s in Hollywood with bleached blonde hair,…

Yeah, I don't really like the dress (her body is clearly amazing but I don't think the dress does anything in particular to flatter it), but her face is stunning.

I feel like there's a difference between a yell that means DANGER and a yell that just means, "I'm pissed off and shouting at you." One is using your voice and words to alert, the other is just using your voice and words as a weapon.

Wait, Katy Perry said that pop stars need to "put it away"? Well if that isn't the pot telling the kettle not to show its boobs.

Right? So brave.

Oh my God, you're right. That comment was one hundred percent serious and I totally thought that pet cats would crowd around my bedside and hold my hand, until now. Thank you so much for educating me on the mental and emotional ability of animals. Please tell me, do cats have the capacity to understand humor? Can it…

If you die with cats, then you are not alone. =D

Honestly, I think I'm just surprised that he's not a more accomplished hypocrite. Like, I have no trouble believing that he's that hateful, but I guess I thought that by his sixties, a career politician would have had to find a more sophisticated, less obvious way of being an asshole. Or that he'd make his stupid…

Also, did you seriously just assume that because I think it's shitty to make fun of overweight people, I must myself be overweight, sedentary and "complaining about a lack of plus sizes"? That's…interesting.

LOL, if you'll look through my history you'll see I'm a professional personal trainer, but thanks for the unsolicited lecture.

“Oh, there’s your date for tonight,” he would say to male members of his traveling crew when they spied a chunky lady on the street.

Yep, when they say pants "show more" they're basically referring the the fact that if a female wears pants you can tell that she possesses a crotch. The entire area where the legs meet the torso is verboten.

Plus their house is a "church" so they don't pay taxes.

Yep, people are always all "well as long as they can take care of all those kids, oh well, it's her life"…well, she doesn't take care of them. She makes her elder daughters take care of them. She's pregnant as often as possible because she claims that God only gifts the very specialest, best Christians with lots of…

This why I seriously go back and forth on the whole issue of her age. Like, she looks much older and I want to believe she's older. But then her mental age is clearly like...yeah, twelve. A twelve that's watched way too much bad porn.