He actually gave nearly all of those millions to charity. About as far from a waste as you can get

Wait, so unlike so many obnoxious parents, the guy was NOT yelling at the refs, he was telling his kid to respect their decisions? And this is why she felt so threatened she needed to call 911? Oh fuck this.

So, she calls the cops under false pretenses (claiming he was aggressive) and her cousin that shows up says that’s her prerogative.

Every man in my family carries a little utility knife. I think it's a country thing? Christmas is really fun, because if you struggle with a package for a second you've got 2-4 men shoving short, stubby blades at you nonchalantly.

Suddenly, a shot rang out!

maybe the kid learned not to drink out of the sippy cup and drank his apple juice exclusively from highball glasses.

Dude told me the podcasts I listened to were too mainstream for him.

Maybe I’m wrong, but each week it seems like “the waitress” is calm and measured in her replies, but the posters are all salty as fuck

Nah, they are a Gen-Xer, so they will be mildly passive-aggressive and then angry about it for days.

So, you’re saying we should BUY?!

This RN post was entirely not rude enough and I am furious that you went off-brand to actually connect with people on a personal level instead of dismissing them with a razor sharp one-liner. As a pillar of the Kinja comment section you should really think twice before making such compassionate posts.

“I was wrongly accused at my town’s best pizzeria.”

sorry, could you repeat that? i couldn’t hear you through your hood

I used to know someone that lost her job and was complaining about having no income. I made the mistake of suggesting applying for a retail/restaurant job to be a stop gap until she found something more permanent. She went off the deep end, because she “has a college degree” and there is no way she would ever debase…

“To be completely honest, I forgot the story I was making up mid-sentence and I still need to say words to complete this sentence and there you go I feel like this is enough words to count as an explanation,” said the woman.

It’s a strong reminder that nothing, but nothing, trumps instant gratification, I think.

“Is it okay if I ignore the rules? My friends say no, but I think it would be okay because the rules don’t apply to me - right?”

Hey Salty,