Is anyone allowed to write for dead spin? Is it like a wiki deal?

You get shot in Chicago if you called it that. But you can get shot there pretty much for anything.

No, seriously. Why do you flop?

Koch is an insufferable douchebag, which you forgot to mention, too.

In wanting to keep showing his Browns' pride, he later shit the bed.

His momma should have named him DeLandrious Fields.

That's a black man in the US saying that Sam shouldn't have a chance because it wouldn't be smooth.

He was also distraught to hear that Putin isn't fries covered with cheese curds and gravy.

There wasn't a dry eye in the house, except, you know, one of his.

a tube filled with posters

Drew Magary, you are at your absolute best when you are shitting all over everybody. Huzzah!

Is she really that popular, because I've never heard of herbivore.

Must be great for all those Packer fans who own shares of the team! What a great investment!

You can meet quota at Deadspin by reposting a letter that everyone's already read and adding a dialogue-styled narrative to it? Brilliant.

This is almost as bad as Bison Dele's boat boner.

Bosh should go back to his original team, too. He belongs there.

Unless Nate Schierholtz is also the name of the guy sitting in the front row behind the plate, that first pitch did not "nearly brain" him. It was really high and it was obvious that it was going to be really high. NON EVENT.

Rizzo will surely enjoy his next at bat against Chapman. What a dipshit.

1908

Look at all those peacocks strutting around.