People are nagging Obama about this half-measure, but can you imagine how difficult it was to get anyone to agree with him on letting even one non-violent offender go free? Freeing 80 whole prisoners probably required 80 separate 72-hour filibusters.

Well, now that Gay Marriage has completely solved any issues facing the LGBT community, Black President means there’s no more racism, and this new order solves our overcrowded and disproportionately black prison population, what do we have left? Us ladies got our slut pills from Obamacare, so that’s out. Maybe...maybe…

Eighty whole people? Golly! I, for one, am glad we fixed this whole prison industrial complex thing. Wooty woot! Time to move on to the next big issue!

Yeah, but was it a male reporter from the Associated Press who discovered this? Because then I’ll pay attention.

Why would he have cared? By all accounts he was possessed of a single-minded focus on his career and comedy—which was never/has never been topical or dealt with any sort of social issues. His comedy may as well be called “First World Problems Humor”.

I like this series, but i find I like Jerry Seinfeld less and less with each episode. How does a guy who was an adult in the 80s and 90s know so little about apartheid...?

Watch Jerry Seinfeld try to explain to Trevor Noah why there were no black people on his TV show, except for the token “sassy black woman.”

NO VOTES FOR TURNCOATS WHILE I WAVE MY TURNCOAT FLAG

:[[[[[[[[

Great. Now I have this image of men having thorny rose stems as dicks and women having rose buds as vaginas.

But it has to be different dicks, right? Because otherwise having sex with even your husband a bunch of times should have the same effect? The logic of this analogy confuses me...

Elizabeth Smart is a woman of unthinkable courage and strength. She has chosen the most noble path possible. Her activism for children who have been raped and sexually abused has no doubt saved countless lives and helped to begin the process of mending damaged souls. She is doing the single most important thing to end…

Dear god. My first reaction is to be disgusted with the boyfriend - but depression, suicidal tendencies, and addiction (which I assume is included here given his intoxicated state) are serious issues and I’m not sure that’s the right route. I do hope he gets help, though it’s going to be an extremely hard battle now…

Shame about the mysogynistic tone of the petition, since it sounds like there are a lot of very valid criticisms of her work and it would be otherwise fairly impressive for a user groundswell to oust the CEO of a popular site.

Yes, the poor sexist manbabies who have taken up days of protest over the unfair firing of a woman by a woman who falsely claimed gender discrimination and made a mockery of such a claim thereby setting back the ability of all women who actually suffer such discrimination to make such claims without seeming like…

What I like most about this is that he isn’t crying he was hacked or making up some convoluted story about how this came about. He’s basically saying, “Look, I was horny and I didn’t know how to use my app properly.” I would have a lot more respect for certain celebrities if they just owned their mistakes and/or the…

That was the best response ever to a butt being posted on Instagram. I love how he's like yes, it's my butt. And I'm ok with it.

DON’T WAIT CALL NOW

The succinct honesty is so, so refreshing.

Ummmm that’s hilarious. IT’S YOURS TO TRY.