Enjoy that mouthful of broken teeth and a lawsuit after face planting into the concrete after hitting some attorney’s mom. 

A cult classic like “Rocky Horror”? No. Maybe like Battlefield Earth or Ishtar, then yes.

I changed a 50$ solenoid in my Focus after I lost my high gear and was quoted 1400$ for a new trans after multiple shops told me the tranny was broken. Screw repair shops. I go to Youtube first.

I don’t think Trump has photos of Graham banging a goat, Putin has them. Just like Putin has photos of Trump getting pissed on by a couple of Moscow hookers. Trump doesn’t have the brains to run a blackmail operation without fucking it up. 

All I had to read was minister and Boy Scout leader to know this guy is not to be trusted. “Bro, did you see the look on her face and what she was wearing? That safety vest and overcoat made her so hot, I had to grab her”. What a piece of shit. 

Enough with Janet Jackson! She was wearing a pasty under the Velcro bra. She isn’t some victim of Timberlake. She was a participant. It was planned. It was free publicity. Get over it.

If you want to watch something funny look up speedbumps in Mexico. They’re 10 inches high, 4 feet wide and unpainted. The locals in resort communities wait for gringos to fly over them and tear out transmissions. Pretty funny.

Nutritional value and BBQ Bacon Burger should not be used in the same sentence.

When you’re as full of shit as Trump is maybe you do have to flush 10 times.

Not that anyone was paying attention but with this years Nobel Prizes was the chemistry award to Dr. John Goodenough and others for the creation of the lithium ion battery. He also created a solid state battery with that will give electric cars a 700 mile range and which will drive a stake through internal combustion…

The Bisquick recipe for Red Lobster cheese biscuits. You had to be restrained when they came out of the oven.

She doesn’t have a duality problem she has a prenup problem. If Trump were to die right now she might get it all if President Dumbass hasn’t given it all to Baron. But then she’d be in charge because of his minor status. The best thing she could do now is want him dead. Nudge, nudge, wink, wink.

Trump is a goldfish throwing magnetic words against a refrigerator. What an idiot. The only way we’ll get him and the half-baked mafia that is the GOP out is to crush them nationwide next year. If the Dems don’t win by 30 or 40 million votes we’ll have to worry about these assholes driving us all over a cliff.

And if they stepped down do you think the press would just leave them alone or make their life even more of a hellscape? At least now they have security or the tabloids would be climbing ladders to photograph them in their bedrooms. Maybe they should move to LA, find a nice estate and live the life of a superstar.…

I drove a Focus wagon way up in the Colorado mountains and had Blizzak tires. The best winter tires ever. I drove through 30 inches of snow and on black ice. I could stop on icy hills no problem. Tires are everything.

Suppose you win the Powerball, you file a 1099-G and pay all the taxes and get an “all paid up” from the IRS. Do you still get crap from the Feds?

I was just going ask Maria to put up “Look at me”. These stories are okay but none of them compare to “Look at Me”.

If only a fan sitting above Trump had accidentally knocked over a 4 pack of beers. Oh well.

Is free insulin included in the price?

Zeppelin and the Stones behind Heart? Put the pipe down.