ZWR: "Roy you see that monkey flinging poo?!"

Roy: "Alex Rodriguez is here?!? Oh my bad, I heard flinging poo & just assumed it was him."

"Excuse me... and how old is this one?"

According to the NFL concussion policy, both strippers will still be available on Sunday.

The women claim that they didn't know the photos were being taken, and that they had nothing to do with the alleged extortion plot.

.16? Fuckin' lightweight.

White paid off … only after endless prodding by people on Twitter (go figure).

Moving a couch up there would suck...

This is breaking 34 different unwritten baseball rules. He will now need to be hit by a pitch 40 times, be expected to not look any pitcher in the eyes for the rest of the season, and have to have dinner with AJ Pierzynski.

It wasn't Carmelo. He wouldn't even pass gas.

What Do Sex Dolls And Cell Phones Have In Common?

LaRussa: Oh, come on! Who cares if it was 95 miles per hour?! It was placed in a safe spot.

Can you blame LaRussa if the fine line between pitching inside and pitching dirty is a bit blurry ?

Another Cubs prospect with a big debut? I can't wait for him to fade out/burn out with an injury/get traded lead them to a World Series!

I'd say the 2 and 5 were switched.

You accidentally switched the 1 and the 5 around, friend. Just lookin' out for ya.

World Series 2015!!!!

Hoover might be nuts, but he still wouldn't have signed Tony Romo to an extension.

I wonder if $5mm will even cover their medical expenses for the remaining ~60 years of their lives. Somehow I doubt it.