Look, it doesn’t matter who I killed, just that you remember I killed them bestly.

Well, at least he remembered how big the cake was. The devil is in the details, you know?

Let me get this straight. Man drops some artwork downtown in form of protest. City loves it and permanently adopts artwork. Another artest drops a different piece of art near the first one as a form of protest/tribute and the first artist is now complaining about his copywrite?

The lawyers were told to leave the settlement check on the nightstand.

I still would. I CAN’T HELP IT.

Dude! Surprised she would be so blunt? She’s Jackie Kennedy Onassis. Of course he’ll say yes. Plus people were probably intimidated to ask her out. Get it! I have mixed feeling about Alec, but would probably have at least banged him back then.

Holocaust centers.

Christ on a flaming cracker, that vainglorious idiot is so wretchedly out of his depth it’s painful to watch. A belligerent, stupid man too bellicose and insecure to even fathom how utterly incapable he is at dealing with a minor traffic infraction, much less an actual honest-to-god international crisis. People will…

Make fun of me if you want, I love this kind man and his music. I’m glad he finally gets to enjoy being himself. Go Barry! Go Barry!

First they came for the CO2 but I was mostly carbon, so I said nothing.....

The love you have for your babies is beautiful and you’re making me cry!

aw. my cats love me so much, it’s always so obvious. they always sit next to me (or on top of me), wherever i go in the house. they follow me everywhere too and wait for me outside the bathroom. i don’t know if they know when i’m coming home, but every day as i pull up to the house after work, they’re in the window…

85% of statistics are made up 76% of the time.

“You have attracted people who are determined that ideology is more important than facts.”

“You have attracted people who are determined that ideology is more important than facts.”

HAHAH AHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAH AHA HAHAHAHAHA HAHA HAHAHA HAH HAHAH HAHAH HAH AHHAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAH AHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHA HAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHA HAH HAHA

I like this moment from earlier today.

To all the moronic fuckers who either actively wanted/turned a blind eye to this racist, sexist, xenophobic, and downright vile piece of shit because “he was a strong leader”. Look at your strongman President now, running like the fucking coward he is, unable to get his own Party to vote against the ACA which they…

repeal and replace this administration.

As someone pointed out above. Thompson was playing a thinly veiled version of Hillary Clinton in Primary Colors, so...