Sir, man from Canada here. What may delight the children, and most certainly yourself, is to simply take several large containers of gas (the ones you use for the lawnmower in the summer), fill ‘em up, and have yourself a controlled fire up and down your driveway. It’ll take 30 minutes, and your kids will shout with…

My fav line is from Weird Science...1985...fucking classic....”Do you think they’re having a good time being comatose in a closet!?!” to Kelly LeBrock

Why stop with football? fuck them. ONE dude fucked it up. I say set the entire State of Pennsylvania on fire and then bomb it back to the stone ages. Nobody likes Philadelphia anyway.

Don’t hurt ‘em, Samer!

Don’s been doing this a LOT longer, my man. Lou’s a poser.

False. I’d much rather watch it on TV. It’s better on an 85 inch screen

I think this is my favorite Deadspin comment of all time. Funny AF

The NFL is just getting shittier and shittier. What a pile of shit.

Fuck you. Canada is a nation of sensible people with conservative fiscal policies and a tolerant society. What the fuck are we supposed to think with what’s going on?? It’s just disappointing that you fit the American stereotype we have for Americans SO WELL. Arrogant. Stupid. Uninformed.

It does make them shrill lesbians. RULES ARE RULES! Yea. That’s so normal. After he sold his land to them, they want to be shrill lesbians and tear down this poor man’s dreams.

Doe had talked to her about a “sleepover”?!!??

So.....having $10M in jewelry in a hotel room with no guards sounds about right for a very wealthy person with smart advisers? Who the hell does that? I don’t care how rich you are, that’s simply absurdly difficult to believe.

I thought he sounded a bit afraid of that woman.

BBAHBAHAHAHAAAA!!! +100

Right!? It’s my Tuesday evening routine, for crissakes!

Oh this one wins, buddy. +1

Fair enough. But I think we have found the issue here: I don’t consider baseball players at any level to be “professionals” in the sense that my colleagues and I are professionals. At all. “Professional athletes” is what they are, to differentiate them from the kids in the park down the street who are in fact not…

“Describing another person’s chosen vocation as “playing a child’s game” is inherently insulting.”

I never insulted you, friend. That’s all you. Have a look and read. Where are my insults?

HAhaaa......nice. Boats are fairly common, my friend. And yes, I have homes. I’m a surgeon. A successful one. :-)