At least there are no sleeves!

The resolution on my phone might not be the best, but I can't even read the names to Google who they are to see how this newspaper messed up.

Good. Mike Olt shouldn’t see the field the rest of the year.

They didn’t try to lock him up or take his license away after the second one?...third?!

Exactly how they drew it up.

“She seems like a keeper.”

That second commentator was wrong. Springer took away a home run or a single at most.

I didn't check the byline when I started reading this article, but after the first two paragraphs it was apparent to me that this was a Burneko article. Best writer on any Gawker site.

I am very much late to the party but I vaguely recognize this reference and want to know what it comes from.

I hate how gorgeous and athletic this man is.

People who actually drink old fashioneds: do you prefer the orange and cherry to be muddled, be put in before the ice or added at the end? I've had 3 different bartenders train me differently and each swore his way was right.

"For example, changing the shape of the handle"

I’m about to piss in some cups at my Cardinals fan friend’s house watching this game.

Fuck Kentucky! *clap clap clapclapclap*

I'm late to the party but since I just found this article maybe someone else will hear my story. I work in a college restaurant/bar and we have nacho cheese that we prepare by unlidding and we throw it in the oven for a half hour to heat up. Sometimes we forget about it or get too busy to grab it. I don't know what…

I like eating a salad that consists solely of pineapple chunks and jalapeño slices.

"His 113 free throw rate..." 113 free throws per field goal attempt? James Harden ain't got nothing on him.

You hear that LA? The Rams are coming back and you'll be on the hook for the stadium!

I don't know. It could be a cyclical thing but I feel a growing disdain for both major parties among my mid 20's social group. And with the proliferation of social media it would be easier to disseminate more hybrid views.

Have you ever tried to swing a driver one handed? No way Tiger beats that dude using only his off hand. His short game will keep him close but he's taking 10 strokes to get the green on some of those par 5s.