bswanandthebusybees
Beatrice_Swans_Busy_Bee
bswanandthebusybees
Oct 14 2018
46

The author’s not aware of too many things, he knows what he knows, if you know what I mean?

Oct 6 2018
61

Matched with a cute guy on a Tinder. He had a shirtless mirror selfie which is usually a hard pass for me, but he seemed sweet/nerdy so I talked to him. He tells me he was heavy growing up and really awkward with women. I’m thinking “This guy doesn’t realize he’s hot.” I’m sick that week and home so we talk a ton and F Read more

Oct 6 2018
61

Late to this party but chiming in anyway: In high school, I was thrilled to be asked to the homecoming dance by one of the star football players. The plan was to meet up after the game, then head to the gym for the dance. When I got to our designated meeting place, I was surprised to see that his entire family—mom, Read more

Oct 6 2018
25

My parrot started imitating her moaning as she was going down on me. She starts laughing uncontrollably and I never got to finish. 

Oct 5 2018
106

This guy took me to the restaurant his family owned. I guess he thought he’d impress me by being a total dick to the wait staff. Snapping his fingers, berating them. At one point he wanted them to line up so he could inspect them. I wanted to crawl under the table. It was obvious they hated him. He didn’t tip. Read more

Oct 5 2018
55

Bad tinder date: Guy did not tell me he was legally blind (not important but is relevant to this next part), so, as a result, he informed he needed to sit VERY close to my face so he could see me WHILE HE HAD THE FLU. So here is this guy, sitting intentionally close to my face, while he has the plague, coughing and Read more

Oct 5 2018
172

I already contributed, but I’m writing another one where *I* was the horror on the first date. Read more

Sep 16 2018
13

I thought it was a clever pun around his being a bay horse. 

Sep 7 2018
57

Right!? Hot, funny, sexy accent. PLUS secretly sensitive (caring for his grandfather before he died) AND did a lot of emotional growth (recognizing arrangement was wrong.) Patrick Verona deserves way more than 6/10. 

Sep 7 2018
91

You have done a great disservice to Heath Ledger/Patrick Verona here, and I will not stand for it!

Aug 26 2018
1.2K

I’m honestly as tired as the “John McCain was a terrible terrible person who no one should say nice things about” pieces as the “John McCain was last of a rare and noble breed of American statesmen” pieces. Dude died just yesterday, and in my universe, it’s still poor manners to interrupt other people’s mourning with Read more

Aug 25 2018
16

For the TL, DR crowd: yep, McCain was a standard-issue Republican/fucking asshole. And a far bigger piece of shit in person than  his PR machine ever let on.

Aug 3 2018
20

Yes, if there’s one thing we all know about classic sitcom character Roseanne, it’s her love of Israel. It’s part of why she ended every single episode with the line, “Go die in a strip club dumpster, Darlene! Hooray for Israel!” Then she’d spit and the credits would roll. Only 90's kids remember!

Jul 28 2018
18

This is an odd criticism. We are not supposed to care about Carol and Barb or feel sympathy for them. They symbolize the true difference between a minimum and a maximum prison. Read more