Clearly you don’t go to the South a lot.

A dumber first name?

If you’re an athletic booster who says you’re fine paying a coach’s eight-figure buyout while the school is having to prepare contingency plans for bankruptcy, then fuck you.

What in the world could Jimbo Fisher bring to LSU that Miles doesn’t already provide?

Don’t worry about Falk. He’s shown he can bounce back.

This was a shock. I mean, who knew he was able to hang around the NFL for 10 years?

Not only would I watch the LIVING FUCK outta that, I would personally burn Bill Simmons house down when he put Larry Bird or Tom Brady first.

“Travel”

“president, founding member, vice-president, treasurer, secretary, and sole member of the...”

Serious question

And “christian” churches are “hotbeds” of misogynistic political speech, sometimes leading to violence. Should we be allowed to go into those as well and arrest pastors?

Tyler, thank you for your sensible, not sensationalist, reporting!

Dude, expecting a good burger or hot dog bun and finding someone else ate it is AWFUL. Just awful.

He obviously walked into the house, found it empty, and assumed that the party was just super lame.

Last night I made myself two bacon cheeseburgers for dinner, and was disappointed to learn that my wife and daughter had already eaten the two buns I was counting on. When I was done beating them and throwing them on my gun pile, I assessed the situation. I could get dressed, get in the car and drive somewhere, or I…

My first thought upon hearing of his passing...

I’m also a big fan of his hide-in-the-bushes method, as opposed to, say, just taking the mask off and explaining what happened. As long as he’s a white dude, that situation would work itself out pretty quickly. Or at least much faster than if they had noticed him hiding in the bushes...

I heard that he died, but hot damn that was a great comment.

The email of the week is unclear if he walked into a house with another party going on, or walked into a house, helped himself to some of that family’s pizza, and wandered around wondering when the party was going to start.

Disney let a dying fan see an unedited version of The Force Awakens. I’m sure he and his family signed a mountain of paperwork saying they would talk about the movie with anyone, but what’s really stopping that fan from spoiling the plot? What if he was disappointed—would a lawsuit really stop him from telling…