It's not that easy in real life, bro! Am I gonna need to make a trek all the way to Hokkaido to find that little old man who'll teach me how to catch 'em? When I then fly to the coast, does it need to be direct, or can it connect somewhere? I'm not that strong a swimmer; is it a problem if I'm in a canoe?

God dammit, I am going to lose so much money buying ultra balls.

I don't like it much, either, but I do get where people are coming from with it. They want to preserve a cultural identity, and that can be a difficult thing to do in the modern world, where there is a big over-culture that has proven adept at wriggling its way into your life.

Enter Sandman very gently, and with great patience

I think Giallo might be the kind of thing best expressed in a supercut, much as I hate to admit supercuts can serve a purpose.

Yeah, that's obviously sub-optimal, it's one of the things we work on.

Aw shucks, I was just happy to be a part of the proceedings.

We try other stuff in the before/after stages, but, ahhhhhhhhhh there are some circumstances around it, regarding ratios of circumferences of things that I'm not sure I can in good conscience share about her. I can talk about my own stuff, but it's different with hers.

I'm in the same pickle, hand-wise. I'm not super-experienced in the first place, and I'm my girlfriend's first. It's not terrible, because I can stay at attention while she does her thing, but I can't finish unless my left hand picks up when she gets sore.

I start out every conversation about good things in the worst possible way.

To whit: the history teacher in my small high school liked to catch our attention by giving us controversial and largely apocryphal snippets of historical trivia or speculation. A lot of it was easily countered or nonsense (he claimed that the industrial revolution would have ended slavery before 1880 without a war…

I smell a hit!

Idris Elba collects a paycheck and maybe a nomination for Best Supporting as the Black Principal who is almost, but not quite, beaten down by the system.

Jim Dale is great. My family did a lot of road trips, and his voice was the best way to keep four kids shut up and well-behaved.

The Hitchhiker's Guide books as read by Adams are my absolute favorite audiobooks. I've listened to other narrators with more range and talent, but Adams is the best voice for his voice, if you understand me.

Secret shame: in middle school, I wrote Bionicle fanfiction that was obviously inspired by Brian Jaques.

To be fair, they're only completely different if you keep focusing on all the ways they're completely different.

I'm not criticizing it for being some new trend. I was more mocking the hoary trope than anything else.

The dick was inside you all along!

God, that sounds like something from a bad "White teacher saves inner city kids" screenplay. Maybe as you explain it, the camera moves in on the Puerto Rican girl, whose eyes start to light up as she finally understands. Maybe some socially conscious hip-hop fades in while a cool black kid nods his head.