Republicans have shown themselves to be extremely principled and dignified. Local government is supported unless it is liberal, in which case they’ll support states’ rights, as long as the state isn’t liberal. If so, they will support federal power, unless the president is liberal, in which case they support local…

Was the sarcasm that veiled? I thought ‘cunt punting America right in its social fabric’ would tip people off.

Communities would fall apart without all the service they provide. Banning them would be like cunt punting America right in its social fabric.

In Labrador’s defense, the President asked him personally to “bark like a dog for me,” and he obliged. Carrying his owner’s ball is in his nature.

We could even make up shit, like - death by castration with a ghost pepper infused Bengay ball soak starter. It could be known as Gorking, yet it wouldn’t be a deterrent, or a particularly good look.

Fuck. I need to read American Gods and The Handmaid’s Tale. I’ve been putting them off for some time, and I don’t have a great explanation as to why that is. Just excuses that don’t hold water.

Okay, let’s flip it: why would you presume that she had no say-so in the matter, unless you think that women are completely subservient to their husbands and have no authority in decision making for their families.

It’s truly groundbreaking, this is why the 9/11 Memorial will be replaced with the Monument of the 10:

Hey! She had to dig deep to come up with a hundred grand. And was magnanimous enough to bestow it upon a select few of the peasantry who praised her work to her liking. “Let them pay for a few books and maybe rent.” - Bey

But...he was so woke. Does woke bae not mean anything anymore?

Gone. Full-blown dementia.

I’m with Nurse Jackie? Anyways, France really fucked up by not running this election two years ago. Think of all the penis jokes that could have ensued. Pen 15' would have been resurrected from third grade just in time for Easter!

Yep! After she’s finished with her shots, I’m borrowing her for the day and taking her to the beach. Gonna be a surfin’ pup! 

While I don’t have a pet, I felt the need to contribute. This is my parents’ recent addition sniffing out my groveler:

Italy is fucking awesome. Try to make a day for the Cinque Terre, just to relax on the beach (or some great cliff jumping) and eat great seafood. It’s a nice reprieve from all the walking that encompasses an Italian vacation. Enjoy!

Agreed, Trump and his spawns occupying the White House is an ongoing nightmare.

One of us! One of us! Gooble gobble, gooble gobble.

Get a clue, sheeple. It was Soros and the libtards in the kitchen with a knife forcing O’Reilly to sexually harass women for over twelve years. Those sneaky bastards play the long game when it comes to sullying the name of a reputable man.

Jefferson Beauregard Sessions III couldn’t possibly be racist, he’s just a huge World Surf League fan, as Hawaii is considered it’s own sovereign surfing nation. If there’s one thing we know about Jefferson Beauregard Sessions III, it’s that he’s got surfing on the mind all the time - not the racism.

A heroin addiction would just humanize this monster. Let’s go with vain concealment of one’s aging process.