I prefer the Discworld dragon mythology. In which case all we need to control them is Lady Sybil, who's floating around here somewhere.

You are my new favorite person.

Lo so very many years ago, my sisters' high school had a rule that prom tickets could only be sold in boy-girl pairs. One or both of my sisters led the charge to get the school to knock that shit off. Good for her/them.

...And now it can't be unseen.

I still can't get over how much Newt looks like a manipulative and slightly pathetic ex-boss of mine. I'm glad the one is out of the picture completely and the other will be soon. Maybe my nightmares will stop now.

That background makes her look like she's levitating. It's trippy.

I can't afford fine suits and I'm probably not a hot older lady, but, uh...what are you doing this weekend?

Next time I fly, if me and my immune system compromised from a chronic illness pick up something on the plane, I'm going to be pissed.

Funny, I really want a beret.

I'm sorry he's dead only because I'm sorry anytime anyone dies. Even the most hated person on the planet had someone who felt some kind of positive emotion about them.

Given the quality of his "art," I'd peg him as Vogon.

This curly-haired tattoo-having cat lover resents that remark.

Further proof that the portal to hell is in New Jersey.

YOU ARE NOT HUMAN.

I did it perfectly! Peeling and chopping is much harder though.

I am ashamed to admit that up until about 20 minutes ago I did not know how to boil an egg.

Well of course there are the classics, Someone Like You and I Will Always Love You. I also like Push by Matchbox 20 (yes I know it's about domestic violence) and a song by Ben Folds Five (I think?) whose name I have forgotten. "Give me my money back, give me my money back, give me my money back, you bitch. And don't…

My family is Israeli, and I lovelovelove certain Israeli snacks.

There's cake in that picture? I totally didn't notice.

She's an oldest/only child, isn't she? My nephew is one of three and he's really relaxed about everything. His oldest brother, on the other hand, sounds exactly like your niece. He runs the family at the ripe old age of 10.