No fucking kidding. I don't recall any overwrought thinkpieces about why giant adult baby Kevin James got to be coddled by Leah Remini in a cute velour sweatsuit for 9 seasons but every season of Girls I have to wade through article after article on how unrealistic it is that a girl with a FUPA catches any dick.

Swing and a miss.

You scared the shit out of me so badly I went to the Eurovision website and searched for their name. I prefer my Eurovision dumbassery to take the form of chanting Babushkas and puffy sleeves thank you very much

"ham-fisted"
"pasty-faced"
You better have snacks, son.

What is going to happen to Spotless, I wonder? The show is excellent, no thanks to Esquire, and they renewed it, so now what?

He was in a totally different universe than all the other characters, it was great. I'd rather watch whatever movie he thought he was in

Also I just necrocommented. I hope it was as good for you as it was for me.

I don't know how to tell you this but Dan Fogler played a main character in the new Harry Potter movie and is likely to return. 2016: the year Dan Fogler happened (plus some other stuff, I'm told)

Raisins are evil though, I had to get my puppy's stomach pumped after she capitalized on an emergency during which I wasn't paying attention to her. At least with chocolate, you understand why they ate it, but raisins?

I can go along with that; incidentally is his character one of the ones who dies, or the one who lost his nose to frostbite perhaps?

We're just gonna keep letting Sam Worthington shadowbox until he tires himself out I guess. Letting him act is just one of James Cameron's many crimes.

Hearing about the blue floor material giving everyone boils has dredged up all this guilt for me. This poor fucker. Marc Summers should be canonized after he kicks the bucket.

ah but it can also be a reference to King of the Hill, which has a baffling episode with a B-plot about that record.

I believe this is the scene where he sings "Wham bam thank you jam! Who's gonna love it? Your family am!"

I do! To be fair, I have the kind of friends who appreciate such a gift, or I wouldn't do it. I want my in-laws to install a bidet but I know better than to forego the Barnes & Noble gift cards for a butt washer.

They feel pretty refreshing, mine just uses room temp water so it's not so cold that I'm rocketing through the ceiling. I dry up with TP afterwards, and still just use TP for #1.

Eh they're like $20 on Amazon and they come with the added benefit of knowing your friends have clean butts

Make America Clean Their Buttholes Again (sorry this joke fell apart like toilet paper upon being touched)

Warning: when you get a bidet, you will refuse to use a toilet without one and your life will get pretty inconvenient. I feel like even more of an animal than I used to when I use a public toilet. I've bought two friends bidets as gifts so I can use their toilet comfortably. A bidet isn't just a purchase, it's a…

Brazil has the right idea, psychological testing for drivers could really reduce traffic.