What’s even worse is that a string broke on the world’s tiniest violin.

No film room today.  You have a meeting with the Bobs instead

He also had troubled with the background screening, given Chubby’s Checkered past.

Landing on some bloated south siders probably would have been softer. 

But like any threeway, someone’s gonna be left with holes unfilled. Only time will tell

Get a load of moneybags here, with his toaster and fresh tomato.

I know they're not widely available but Grippo's are the best.

How long do you think they kept a straight face when they told him he got traded to New York?

Joule thief!

My brother in law is a Jets fan.  Talk about a guy who makes poor life choices. 

WHY IS IT 3RD AND LONG AGAIN

Kid dies trying to become an Islander. Garth Snow signs him to 15 year contract.

He probably has a financial advisor. I suggest he switches.

So he thought they had given him the starting job, only to have the team take it back? There should be a term for that kind of giving.

You’re not an intelligent person and nobody values anything you have to say.

Swimmers Upset Swimmer Won’t Piss, In Pool

The numbers don't lie, guys in funny glasses hit better when they're clean shaven. Obviously he's been studying Sabometrics.

It’s not a Jeremy Hill jersey. He would have fumbled the beer.

Shocking news that being shoeless is a notable characteristic in Kentucky.