I think the word you were looking for there was "everything" rather than just "something."

Well, except for Ivanka.

Plus, he couldn't get those tiny hands around the infant in order to pick him/her up.

Dude, "Irish" is not the preferred nomenclature. Fenian-Americans, please…

Are those cats up top or koala bears?

Know a guy named Seannon. Yeah, pronounced Shannon. With an Italian last name.

"Irish immigrants are ok with me, because they are white."
—-The Prez

"Yeah, I'm thinking I'm back!"

Juan Williams: Just take it easy man.
Sean Hannity: I'm perfectly calm bro.
JW: [shouting] Yeah, waving the fucking gun around?
SH: Calmer than you are.
JW: Will you just take it easy?
SH: Calmer than you are.

Maybe Lois can "jump the fence" and start seeing Supergirl.

Was it the Global Thermonuclear War version? That might explain the short playing time.

Or a short-fingered tiny hand.

T Rex, huh? Marc Bolan smiles in heaven, bangs gong.

I hope that's not the Bud Ice Shooby-Dooby-Doo penguin from the Bud Ice ads. That fucker creeped me the hell out.

American fanny or British fanny? There's a big difference.

And go to the movies with, so you don't look like some kind of loner weirdo.

And any dogs that are out there reading these comments, don't eat cat turds. And if you're my dogs, please stop eating deer shit.

Hey, at least Musharraf was down with going on the Daily Show. You never saw Saddam Hussein getting interviewed by Jon Stewart.

The only airline I've ever seen where the carry-on-sizing racks weren't mere decorative items was Lufthansa. I had to check a briefcase once because it was about an inch too long. Luftwaffe!

Yeah, an English buddy of mine flew down to meet me in Italy, Ryan Air from Stanstead to Venice cost him around 8 or 9 Euros.