Right now.

Pretty sure he would have missed all of them anyway.

Man. Chris Davis is the 2019 Orioles of players on the 2019 Orioles.

Look at his username, obvious troll is obvious.

A steady diet of Skyline Chili affects different men in different ways....but it always ends in a case of multiple violent runs.

This, then, is what happens when a king of the three true outcomes loses his bat speed, and with it his power to keep pitchers honest, and is reduced to a one-true-outcome hitter. (The one true outcome for all of us is decline, and, eventually, death.)

As a fan of another abysmal team, I refuse to feel sorry for these Orioles fans.  You knew goddamn well what you were going to go watch when you bought the ticket.  Is there a single person in that stadium that went to the game with honest high expectations?  Anyone who has seen their starting lineup and has even the…

Geez, I feel old. In my circle of friends sex is usually coupled with pizza being delivered and wearing a pair of old sweatpants.

And Green Onions is not on the list? WTF???

More than anything else, this encapsulates the need for better healthcare services for patients who aren’t super-rich.  Given hospital waiting times, it’s doubtful that most of us would be out of the hospital, home and raping comfortably just six hours after a major injury like that.

Good, now get your friends and family to care too and spread the word.

Nah, there was that White man who was on tape begging for his life in a motel hallway, unarmed, who was also gunned down for no reason. That shit was barely a blip on the radar for White people.

You think Deadspin “stans” for the Warriors? Holy shit that’s obtuse. 

I am replying to myself and my own article to let the record show that I am not racist since I wear white after Labor Day.

Sigh, I get the joke and not to be that guy, but please let’s not confuse being intentionally dumb and mean spirited as the same as being intellectually disabled.

I also have mean pop-culture related things to say about her.

Hey now, why do you gotta muddy an old man’s rant with actual evidence? 

“Herrera’s in a league of his own. Oh, sorry, I meant Herrera should still be in a league of his own.”

What do you call it when you fail to stretch out that easy triple?

No wonder the scout is anonymous.....couldn’t see under that pointy hood he kept wearing.