What happens when you smash together a description for Cubs-Cardinals and one for “Gang Bang Sluts 9”?

Yeah, but when you get them they’re all dirty.

Thank God for Brian Dawkins. When I finally decided to splurge for a jersey about 10 years ago, it came down to him, Westbrook or David Akers (for irony value). I went with Dawkins. I had no idea it’d turn into a timeless classic. A Dawkins jersey might be the safest jersey investment ever for any fan base.

"What's the big deal?"

Or, you know, she recanted once the cops started asking questions and poking some holes in her story and they arrested her because she was full of shit and wasted their time.

He played at a junior college in Mississippi last season. I believe you only have to sit out a year if you’re transferring between schools on the same level (such as FBS to FBS or FCS to FCS). Guys, especially upperclassmen, transfer from FBS to FCS schools all the time without sitting out.

Always love (meaning despise) the Christmas car commercials.

This post is funny to read as a wrestling fan, because it's like you've been in a coma for 10 years.

Reigns did a great job in that match, beyond taking a hellacious beating like a pro. His expressions and reaction sold it well. The first third of the match, he had the "What truck just hit me?" face going. The second third, it switched to the "I can't believe this is happening" face. The final stretch, when he…

Sad you think that, because this was a really great show from top to bottom. Of the seven matches on the main card, five were outstanding and the other two were at least decent.

For us non-smokers with no dog in this fight, I'll offer the smokers a deal.

So, like, three?

Those guys got a $10 gift certificate to White Castle.

Looks like he's doing the Tomahawk Chop.

There was a show maybe 10 or 15 years ago where they had gathered some of the best living hitters of all-time. I can't remember everyone who was there (it was 5 or 6 guys in a roundtable discussion), but I know two of them were Tony Gwynn and Ted Williams.

Glad I'm not alone. I had no idea who this woman was. Now I know.

Of course. Screamed like a happy little girl when it happened. To this day, I think that's my favorite football play of all-time. I can watch it 20 times in a row on YouTube before I have to make myself pull away and do something else.

I was a student at LSU when they beat No. 1 Florida in 1997. The goalposts were torn down, and one of the uprights started making its way through the student section after the game. It was about to get chucked over the top of the stadium when some alert security guard realized what was happening, put a stop to it, and…

I'm a sports writer at a small newspaper, and once or twice a year we journey to the state's SEC school to cover a football game.

Simmons was fine. He actually does follow WWE (he's referenced it a ton on his podcast since his son is into it), so he wasn't like some of the other dumbass celebrity guests on Raw who think Hulk Hogan is still champion.