The mascot coming partially into the frame in slo-mo is both creepy and funny as fuck. It's like Keyboard Cat is reaching into the clip to either slap her for being such a pansy, or to claw her eyes out and keep this from taking his spot on YouTube's list of most-played videos.

The show was in Tijuana. The ringside doctor was probably selling $10 Xanax tablets to college kids two hours earlier.

That was a Ric Flair style low blow, getting him with the wrist and not the fist.

Love UTEP's stadium. The stands are actually built into the side of the mountain. You can look and see where the supports extend into the rock face.

Amen. I was an A-B student through high school (always managed to get one C that kept me off the honor roll every single marking period), did OK on the SAT and went to a big state school where I got a degree — albeit in a shitty discipline — with the same type of grades. Life has turned out pretty fine.

So I guess "Old Sparky" isn't just the nickname for Florida's electric chair any more.

Nine points? Whoever came up with that idea must have been high.

And six teams have combined to win 31 of the last 35 titles, although 19 teams have made Finals appearances in that span. Dynasties are a big reason for the small number of champions (Lakers/Celtics in the 80s; Bulls in the 90s; Heat/Spurs in the 00s and 10s).

My standard for whether a PPV was worth the money or not was always if there were two matches I wanted to see and a third that was unexpectedly enjoyable. Or some combination of those that equals three matches that I enjoyed. I think we've got that this year.

The Crystal Lake Police Department is the worst. Just the absolute worst.

It's actually Parts 2-4 that take place over the same week, although they're not long after Part 1.

Part V scared the shit out of me as a kid. I watched the first four by the time I was 9 years old with no issues whatsoever. Then Part V came along and I was taken aback at how unrelentingly brutal it was with the pace of the kills. In analyzing it later in life, I realized why it was so disturbing. It was just so…

Body Count: 12 Countdown Until Drugs And/Or Pre-Marital Sex: 18 minutes Weapons: Meat cleaver, knitting needle, pitchfork (2X), spear gun, machete (2X), knife, fuse box, fireplace poker, head crush, wrench How Jason Dies: Briefly hung, then a machete to the head Best Kill: Spears are not meant for eyeballs.

That looks like the lineup full of randomly generated names when you're about 15 seasons into franchise mode on NBA2K15.

Clearly, this was a man at work. Sadly, the dance was not as safe as it seemed.

My Virginia (near) horror story didn't involve jail time, but after reading this I'm thanking God that it didn't.

"By which I mean I shrugged, waved, and proceeded to enter my motel room where I chain smoked two packs of cigarettes while watching old Law and Order episodes."

Another mysterious "between the mattresses" item. Is that like the place lost dryer socks go? Do people just stuff random crap between the mattresses before checking out for shits and giggles? Is there a community out there that gets their jollies off of this? Maybe there's a Gawker site to be had where people post…

It'll always be Boston's second-favorite, though, behind the Bird sandwich.

Chip Kelly has become that asshole who starts with a paper clip and keeps trying to trade for things until he has a car.