In keeping with the theme of the Pooporoo:

Well, you can be constipated and still have horrible bouts of diarrhea. Like I said, it's the great irony of it.

This. The last time I shit myself was about 10 years ago. I was on the phone with my boss talking about some work thing and felt like I had to fart. Turns out I had to shart. I sent a shotgun blast of poop screaming into the back of my underwear like the crash nets on a carrier catching a runaway plane.

I'm sorry, but I really don't know. I was a kid at the time and that was probably 25 years ago now. They could have been pumping rocket fuel an liquid Ex-Lax up my ass for all I know. I have heard that high colonics work well, though. It's like spraying a garden hose at your house to clean it (enema) vs. using a…

A few years ago my wife and I went to New Orleans for a day trip. We got to town, parked at Jax Brewery and went inside to use the bathroom. Jax Brewery is a mall in the middle of the French Quarter that has one of the few free public bathrooms in the city.

I feel your pain, brother. I was the same way as a kid, except the constipation and impacted colon lasted until about my sophomore year of high school. My belly was so swollen it looked like I was pregnant (I'm a guy, BTW, so this wasn't good). Part of the problem was school. How do you excuse yourself for 10 minutes…

Since there's some major love for the Venture Brothers here, I'll just say that the Season 1 episode "Tag Sale ... You're It!" is one of the most phenomenal episodes I've ever seen, of any show EVER, from a plotting and pacing standpoint. In the span of 22 minutes or so, they have at least eight different plots going…

The map looks like the Marvel Universe is about to play a giant game of Risk.

The one on the lower left looks like he's about to go shoot a porn scene.

So what I learned from all of this is that junior high girls are terrible, terrible human beings.

Whenever they have those awkward sex ed classes in sixth grade, the ones where they split up the boys and girls to different rooms and talk about body parts, they really need to include that in the lesson plan.

The fact that they're 5 is also pretty integral to their characters. The way they fight villains and interact with each other is as little kids would, plus there's a certain innocence about them that made the show fun. Aging them up completely takes that out of the picture and destroys the core aesthetic of the…

I think HBK could still go. He seems in pretty good shape and left at the top of his game. He'd also be smart enough to work around his physical limitations without looking too bad. You're right about the rest of them, though. Broken down rust buckets, all of 'em.

Another thought on time travel's downside .... you'd better be a damn fine historian or archaeologist. You'd have to intimately know the history of every place you time travel from to go back more than a few weeks or months. Imagine traveling back in time 100 years in your living room, only to find out that 100 years…

The bigger your actions, though, the more you screw things up. If you go back to 1925 and kill Hitler, for example, you're not only probably stopping WWII. There were so many factors that led to that, that it would've happened anyway. You might make things worse by your actions leading to an even more dangerous and…

Is time travel actually a power, though? Think about it. We've always heard that every action and decision people make creates an infinite number of alternate realities. So, theoretically, are time travelers who change things really changing things, or just hopping from reality to reality without any chance of ever…

I remember a Wolverine story once where he was fighting a telepath. The guy was kicking Wolvie's ass because he could read his mind and anticipate all of Wolverine's moves. Wolverine finally defeated him by going into berserker mode and "turning off" his mind to the point he was just reacting instead of plotting out a…

... Or when some numbnut who isn't paying attention jumps out in front of you? Splatter city, man.

The wild-card and divisional round playoff bonus works out, roughly, to a game check for a player making the rookie minimum salary of $420,000. So there is a basis for that figure, even if it's a little low (especially for veterans and higher-paid players).

I'm amazed that comment made it all the way through from 1924.