Great stuff. That's the kind of form that would win you games against Koln Hamburg Schalke Stuttgart Mainz DAMMIT

Seriously dude? A video of the guy dying?

Go away.

Are you serious? This is a gold-mine for opposing managers. If I were Neil Warnock I would totally pay the Chelsea technical area a visit every 15 minutes, starting off with a very early handshake, and then successively bringing wine, then flowers, then maybe a newspaper so they can read the backpages together. These…

Dammit bro, will you put that away? I keep cutting myself on your edginess.

Why. Why do you go out of your way to write badly? I root for you and you let me down every time.

pew pew p-p-p-p-pew

It's never the game you expect.

False negatives strike again.

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He went three DMF with 20 minutes left. Who does that?

If he needs a sedative, there are still 15 minutes of Italian 9-0-1 left. Should be more than enough to put him out.

Well then don't get too excited.

...

I'm dying here.

"Reader" Tim you say? So this wouldn't be a resident anglophile that "sent" you this email? Admit it, you were dying to get this story published and this was your hastily-crafted ruse.

[spits drink]

Stay classy guys.

Wow. Rio is beautiful.