And I was wondering how many assholes would mistake your cheap Luke Cage look for a Trayvon Martin costume.

His best tweet ever was when he pointed out that his fastball was as close to Mo’ne Davis as it was to Aroldis Chapman.

To be fair, though, you and your family pretty much suck.

“Ware’s house?”

First Guy: “We need money. Let’s rob a warehouse.”

Quarterbacks who golf are almost invariably very good at it though due to athleticism and tremendous hand/eye coordination. I’m a fat lawyer who plays like once a month. He should be a lot better than I am.

Look Terry, I know you’re trying to get back in Vince’s good graces so you can go back to getting that sweet WWE Legends contract money, but this is not the way to do it. You’re better off trolling the TNA forums.

A witty saying proves nothing. - Voltaire

Here’s how I’ll remember Aaron Heilman. During the last season at Shea, a few buddies and I took a Thursday off at the end of the season to take in a Thursday afternoon rain makeup against the Pirates. More importantly, it was the last time we’d all see a game together at the ballpark we grew up in. The Mets had a…

Agree completely. They didn’t even cite noise until they were pinned in a corner and forced to explain how this affects them personally. It was more like an afterthought.

Yasiel Puig, 6'3", 245 lbs, is very clearly morbidly obese

The O’s were 4th in MLB in Tv viewers.

“Disorder’s for me. Dat one, too.”

Funny, Adrian Peterson’s son’s face is imprinted on his cleats too.

My thoughts exactly. On someone else’s nickel? Lol, dude you sell 90,000 tickets a game off of his free labor! Eat a dick.

Not many people know this but Milwaukee actually comes from an old Ojibwe word meaning “Yeah, but what about Black on Black crime?”

Tom, being not impressed.

Hinkie had classes, but traded them for future classes and a guest speaker opportunity. He’s currently looking to swap the guest speaker slot for Starbucks gift cards and/or wi-fi passwords.