I got a doctorate in stats from a big university. Your description of the announcers referring to proper nouns within the game in English reminds me of how I would listen to a bunch of Mandarin but interspersed with proper stats nouns like “expected value”, “Taylor series”, “delta method”, etc.

My stepdad, in the middle of the falcons fucking themselves in the 3rd quarter, said: “We will lose because that’s what Atlanta teams do.” I yelled at him then but now I have to admit: Atlanta will always fail on the biggest stage and i should just not hope. The second step in trying is failing.

All my stars...Aretha would be proud.

I’m listening to Phish right this second and almost did a spit take. Ha!

I don’t think he straight up stole it but I do think it was all improvisation. He saw Mignolet was not paying any attention to them and saw the left side of the net wide open. He told Willian to step aside and quickly took the opportunity. Quite brilliant thinking on his feet.

No, they don’t necessarily have to fall off. Given the spending difference between them, the fact that Klopp had the success he did is unbelievable. Honestly, it’s kind off sad how competitive the Bundesliga is given how vastly Bayern outspends the league. They spend Real/Barça/ManU/Juve sums of money in a league…

Everton supporter here...I find it fascinating how Man U supporters seek to make Rooney anything less than a legend. Jesus, remember his glory days with SAF.

Oh...oh...oh my god. That is the worst drivel I’ve ever read. And I was a big fan of Grantland (in terms of the talent he recruited) but holy shit. That is some of the worst type I’ve ever been subjected to. Fuck you for making me read that. And fuck BS even more for writing it.

“...Conte’s switch to a 3-4-4 formation...”

.

Why don’t Baptists like drinking?

“The Raboner”

Damn it don’t make me cry at work!

Why would Barca need to find a replacement? ter Stegen was already at Barca...

ETA: I’m a bit slow this morning and this joke went soaring over my head. That’s what I get for being pedantic.

I once had a Chinese friend who said China was a “60 foot country,” as in if you don’t go within 60 feet of any structure they are all beautiful.

Bet they get a free bowl of soup.

Jesus. Here’s your summary (Trump sucks donkey balls and all that jazz):

If I remember the first deal was $12m first year and $6m each in years two and three. I don't know what parts of it were guaranteed.

...and someone who is about to turn 29. Absolutely ridiculous to spend this kind of money on him. If you want an actually well-thought out article on this subject check this out.