I voted for Trump because I want to hear someone read “Donald Trump’s Gross Tennis Ass” on a microphone at the awards.

I’m in Miami, so yeah. But his face is more punchable because of the person it’s attached to; I have no idea whether Darnold is quite as much of an asshole.

I used to do that. PBB&J!

- The National Anthem before NFL games

“Flags. I fucking hate flags. You fucking hate flags. Everyone fucking hates flags.”

Let’s not forget that Josh Jackson was a fucking asshole, that Kansas allowed him to be a fucking asshole, Bill Self enabled his fucking assholeishness, and thus he is likely still a fucking asshole.

More like Pittsburgh Stealers, amirite?

This is unsurprising to anyone who’s paid attention to the Colts for the past decade or so, since the only O-lines Jim Irsay cares about are crushed up oxycontin.

This is when you drop $5 for a quick shit and always-okay Spicy Italian, my friend.

you’re gonna get a bunch of 90s trip-hop fans with your little blog about Portis head hits

WTF, no opinion on diagonal staples? So much better, and less chance of tearing.

I’m extremely pro-protest, pro-Kap, and believe it’s fucked up he’s not on a roster, but it’s legitimately difficult to imagine a guy coming on to a team in week 6, who is just an average QB at this point, would give them a better chance to win than a 3 year back up.

They’d rather sign Wrangler Boy first, and he’s made of glass at this point.

I wonder how many consecutive blowouts it will take for Packer fans, in all of their knuckle-dragging, mouth-breathing glory, to swallow their pride and call for Kaep.

Mm hmm, I’m gonna need those USMNT reports by cob Tuesday, okay? Thaaanks.

On Monday, Trump said he would be looking “very, very strongly” at welfare reform, reasoning that “people are taking advantage of the system and then other people aren’t receiving what they really need to live and we think it’s very unfair to them.”

Of course, Kyrie thought he was speaking to a reporter from the Boston Rectangle.

It was picked up not because of anything he was wearing, but a bit more to do with how he climbed on a moving schoolbus and went batshit.

There is no way someone hasn’t recognized her. There is something larger at play here and the whole thing stinks. Someone has to be protecting her identity, because there’s loads of evidence, especially since the security footage is pretty clear. WHY ARE YOU PROTECTING HER?! The circle of lies keeps curling out. …

Seems like CSPD ought to be less worried about the calls coming from journalists, and more worried about the calls