I would actually love some good fried chicken right now. But my craving has no relationship to it being Black History Month. I just like fried chicken.

I got a perfume bottle stuck in my vagina and had to wake my parents to be taken to the emergency room to get it taken out, to their very great embarrassment.

OMG, that's amazing. I did a spit-take with my fried rice. Off to clean my keyboard.

I have tears in my eyes, that is so awesome. Bravo, Alan!

I actually get toothaches with my migraines. I went to the dentist once because I was in so much pain and we could not find any cause other than the migraine. Talk about suckage.

Bingo. I've been saying I'm a vampire for decades. I can't tolerate the sun at all (in addition to migraines I burn without SPF 4000 and an umbrella).

Now I need a burrito bowl with barbacoa, extra cheese, guacamole, salsa, sour cream and rice. I shouldn't read this when I'm hungry. But it's true their portions are huge, I can never finish them.

I would say that registering for a $200 gravy boat also makes you look like a tool, unless you and your friends are already in that economic zone. If the only thing on your registry I can afford is a sugar spoon (and I'm not a starving student), I will think you are a tool.

Hey, that's a perfectly sensible arrangement, plus you are happy with it - and your opinion (vis a vis this blog) is the only one that counts.

Not in every state, thank Bast.

I realize this is kind of late, but my husband is really bad at apologies or admitting he is wrong. So he tends to shout, I'M SORRY! really angrily, as if I'm supposed to accept that as sincere.

Boston puppy! Can I give you all the stars?

This is true. I just moved to an apartment across the street from a pizza place that sources its ingredients from italy and its pepperoni is AMAZING. It has real heat and just tastes so good, not like a circle of salt as many pepperonis do.

(Milk-hating lady being Kara, not you).

And gelato! The good ones are as good as ice cream, but are made with MILK instead of cream! Take that, milk hating lady!

Or go to Nigeria and take a shot at some of Boko Haram. What the matter dude? Afraid to take on someone who might try to kill you back? Spineless disgusting weasel.

If absolutely needed to kill Muslims, he should have joined the military to fight Daish (sp?), not murdered a bunch of innocent, unarmed kids. Cowardly, disgusting excuse for a human being.

So beautiful when someone has such mastery over their body.

I cannot imagine getting naked with my sister. I might change clothes in her presence, if unavoidable, but doing a naked prank? Fuck no.