If they swapped it, I hope it was Febreezed before being worn.

But at 82 years young, Dame Joan Motherfuckin’ Collins still reigns.

#oscarssobitchy

At first I thought Chris Rock introduced Niecy Nash.

It’s called show business for a reason. You make the studios money and they reward you - eventually - with some trophies. They don’t always reward those who actually deserve it.

*slap*

Sploosh.

So... he asked a whore if he can call another woman a bitch.

And the other joke is they hired Ryan Reynolds to play a character that is basically already Ryan Reynolds.

Now I have a visual image of Donald going, “It’s gonna be huuuuge.”

You know Joan is just going to show up at the last minute and claim that the entire estate belongs to her.

By the looks of it, Aretha has been at the buffet for the past 30 years.

International singing sensation Rita Ora *teenager eye roll*

Reminds me of Miu Miu ads (only with, ya know, skinny white models).

This wedding is going to be epic.

Will Smith will not attend the Oscars...

* follows him into bedroom, locks door, hides key in underwear, makes him find key *

...don’t tell Seth Rogan he’s hot.

Chering is caring.

Chinese poet and activist Ai Qing, who spent time in Paris in the 1920s and ‘30s...