I’ve always liked this, and this one surprisingly doesn’t look too shit-upon, either by the previous owner(s) or by Pep Boys, or J.C. Whitney. That said, sounds like some strange things have been afoot of late in the engine room.

I think I got syphilis just from looking at the photographs. CP.

I think “Super Cruise” is the fucking coolest name I have ever heard.

3500 US bones for AWD, turbo and a stick? In a wagon? Hell, that’s less than half what I paid in maintenance alone over the less than two years I owned my 2009 Passat 2.0T wagon, may its memory be perpetually pissed on. Hell, if I were closer I’d buy this myself.

Rock-hard tasty abs, washerboard style! Thanks for catching the reference.

Gah...can’t decide can’t decide can’t decide BRAIN ANEURYSM

Self: “Gah. Another anonymous potato-shaped SUV that’s just gonna spend most of its time in the drive-thru at Starbucks. Plus this one’s a BMW which means when it breaks, it will be a bitch to fix as well as prohibitively expensive. It would be rational to walk away.”

I meant that. Crap. Thanks.

Man, these piss me off. There was a golden age of motoring from the late 70's to the early 90's where you could purchase stuff from Japan that was reliable, sexy, rear-drive and kinda fast from the factory. All that remains of that era that hasn’t been wrapped around a tree by some ham-fisted jackanapes seems to have…

All I know is the purple ain’t doing it for me.

I don’t care that it looks like it got raped by Manny, Moe and Jack. All that shit can be removed. This one’s a NP all day.

I was 18 in 1991. I think that’s all I need to say.

He’s pretty Loyale to the true purpose of Subaru.

Man... if you buy this you must really hate yourself.

I dunno on this one... it’s a close call. It would have been a coin toss, but I like the color. So NP. That is all. Carry on.

I bought a 2009 Passat 2.0T Wagon from a reputable dealer. It had full service records and fewer than 85,000 miles on it when I bought it.

*you're

Oh my God no.

Holy fuck, no.

Yes, he’s joking/using sarcasm.