God almighty this sentence here:

In vino veritas, beeyotch. The booze doesn’t CAUSE the behavior. It removes the filters and inhibitions that normally PREVENT the behavior. A guy who inherently doesn’t rape won’t suddenly turn into a rapist after a couple of beers.

YES! I look forward to that podcast just as much as housewives.

Her advice is often terrible though. And she’s an asshole. also, naming something “skinny girl” and profiting off women’s body insecurities fucking sucks so fuck this woman seven ways til Sunday.

Bethenney needs a time out. She’s been disgusting this season - rude, crass, mean, abusive.

(Much like a marriage) I too want a business to succeed.

That should be their next season big trip. Go to Nigeria to see Sonja’s football team! Of course they'd get there and they wouldn't be able to see them since the entire team mysteriously came down with Legionnaires disease the night before they arrived...

I understand that, according to the constitution, Obama needs to step down as president but what’s the law on Michelle staying on as FLOTUS?

Dolores Catania and Siggy Flicker sound like the newest cast members on The Sun Also Sets.

Holy shit yes. I hadn’t been by the site in about three or four years, and a couple weeks ago I found myself there and was just appalled. It’s all horrific click-bait headlines from awful people telling awful stories about awful things.

“judgmental, self-absorbed, and unreflective,” should be xoJane’s tagline.

Is morally corrupt

I just visit Peter Pan Donuts in Greenpoint if I need to feel better.

Blah blah blah Holly/Kendra war of words: BRIDGET I MISS YOU! I ALWAYS THOUGHT YOU SEEMED SO SWEET!

Maybe they haven’t even pushed the publish button yet cuz they’re still spitballing ideas.

I am pretty firmly entrenched in my singledom but this may just be the thing to actually make me want to get married. Mark this down as the first and only time I have unironically said, “HASHTAG RELATIONSHIP GOALS”

omg Rebels face/reaction gave me the giggles.

I’m wearing 16 now and am so bummed. But not so bummed out that I didn’t eat some cake yesterday. Today is another day...

My father invented passive aggressive post it notes.