We’re in the final stages of my fantasy of Ovechkin being a super spy sent to play in the NHL with the ultimate goal of winning the Cup to earn a trip to the White House and assassinate the president. I don’t condone assassination, but you’d have to respect the long game.

Somebody needs to the leak the mass email sent out to all department heads to round up all of their employees and bring them to the South Lawn for mandatory public patriotic reeducation time.

Give him a break. He correctly identified the sun. I didn’t think he had it in him.

What a spineless, silver spooned, bone spurred messy little bitch.

Meanwhile the 3 Russians on the Capitals are wondering why everyone else isn’t as excited as they are to go see their President.

He literally pulled the exact same Eagles stunt last year - got wind that Curry and friends were strongly leaning towards not attending and preemptively disinvited them before they could make an official statement declining. Come to think of it that’s the exact same thing he did with this North Korean summit,…

“Sad, failing Lebron James should worry less about getting invited to the White House (a great honor!) and more about winning games! Loser!”

They would be the first team with a Russian captain to visit the first Russian president of the United States.

It’s fun that he spent 8 years shitting on the president before deciding that the office of president is above reproach.

This is bad on so many levels. Anyone with half a brain know for a fact not a single Eagles player knelt during the anthem. Not. A. Single. One. Yet this organization uses a player (in this case, Zach Ertz) praying and transposed it to fit the narrative; which is ironic considering Fox’s targeted demographic are…

ABC: We’re bringing back Roseanne!

Let’s convince them to boycott Twitter.

So what item are far-right lunatics going to boycott and/or or smash to impotently protest this?

I know. Intolerance of intolerance is the worst kind of intolerance, isn’t it.

The horrifying triumphant rise of Roseanne followed by the almost immediate fall was so brief that it was comical.

You may be watching the games, but you clearly aren’t paying attention.

65 regular season wins, a number one seed, a dominant first two rounds, ending the longest home winning streak in NBA playoff history and holding the highest scoring team in the NBA to less than 100 in hundred in consecutive games was all it took for Deadspin to write a story acknowledging the Rockets might actually…

I’m not ready.

I’m an active duty Soldier (so people can feel free not to @ me). I say eliminate the damn thing. It doesn’t make any sense to play it anyway, and it always just makes me wonder if the Packers and Steelers forget what country they are in and have to be reminded at the start of every game.