All I can think of when I see that big black maw is it making a “WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA” sound as it drives down the highway.

1984 Plymouth Voyager. This is not a picture of our van, but it does have accurate paint damage and fading. The thing was a tank and could only reach the dizzying speed of 55 mph by going downhill with a tailwind but it was a great, safe car for an enthusiastic teenager taking friends on Taco Bell runs.

Colloodling?

Nope, read the whole thing, assumed you were trolling, realized to my dismay you weren’t, and felt compelled to say something to stop this usual bullshit circle-jerk of “Fuck basic people! Fuck the Midwest! And fuck fatties!” Even if you’re “kidding” (which you weren’t), it has no place on a feminist site.

Meaning what?

Oh, I get it! Fat people have no taste! Completely unlike skinny people, especially if the fatties aren’t from the coasts! Lololol!

FUCK.

I assumed the correct pronunciation was “Jaaaaaaaaag".

God, I so get this. As a morbidly obese woman who jiggles when I’m just existing, let alone exercising, I feel so much sympathy for all women who are not made from taut catgut who have to subject ourselves to the gym.

Seriously, READ THE FUCKING COMMENTS you ignorant shitbag. facw already explained why survivors of sexual assault don’t always report it right away.

Goddammit, Walnuts! How can I retroactively rescind every kind word I said about you before your 2008 Manchurian Candidate brainwashing?

I’ve been a Bernie supporter since before his presidential campaign and was even a local delegate for him, but I will be proud to vote for Hillary in the general election. She’s a tour de force, which is easy to forget until she gives speeches like this and makes me proud to be American again.