Update 7: It’s been two years, one month and 15 days since I washed my legs. We moved from Brooklyn to a suburb of Boston. The toddler has developed a personality. He’s a nice guy. This past summer was so hot that I even wore shorts a few times, but no one commented on the cleanliness of my legs. 

You’re crazy, that scene under the porch from The Visit was so scary that I was very very frightened.

Hey, could we get a white guy to talk about racism while standing in front of a bunch of black guys who nod seriously like yeah, that’s just what I would have said?

Update 6: It has now been over a year since I tried washing my legs. Since then, there has been no time when I’ve rubbed soap on my legs. My legs continue to be fine. The baby is walking and talking. He is a toddler. Lots of things happen to toddlers so all of him has been washed quite a lot. The toddler isn’t part of…

OH FOR JESUS’S SAKE DO NOT READ THIS TERRIBLE MAN’S TERRIBLE ADVICE, the cheese will not melt all the way, it will get sweaty and disgusting. This tool is going to ruin cheeseburgers for everyone. KEEP DOING WHAT YOU’RE DOING AND IGNORE THIS NIMROD.

Stephen Miller, is that you?

No it doesn’t.

My kid was born with a hiatal hernia and they fixed it with surgery. I have no idea who Aaron Carter is. This has been the only thing I know about hiatal hernias.

I wanna just confirm that I when read that dude’s Wonder Woman review I definitely thought it was some bullshit, and when I saw Jezebel’s piece about it I definitely thought yeah, that’s what I thought too.

Aw, man, I was really hoping for Wifey.

Update 5: Day 192 of not washing my legs. Still not shorts weather - it is never shorts weather, shorts are bad - but have received no complaints from anyone in re. unwashed state of legs.. Note that I do have leg hair, a perfect amount of leg hair, in fact, enough that I look suitably manly but not so much that…

OMG THIS VIDEO IS REALLY SOMETHING

I like these tips! Thank you!

Macy’s is on the #grabyourwallet boycott list - they sell Trump products - so this is great news.

It would be fucking hilarious though.

Don’t worry about it. I already have a tattoo of your dog’s face and it looks amazing.

YES

You’re the bomb! Thanks!

Do you have a link to that? I searched briefly but failed to find it. That dude is smart and I’d like to read it.