Thank you for acknowledging my wittiness.

Good luck affording housing in Silicon Valley on that pittance of a salary!

“Tried to make me go to rehab, I won’t went, went, went.”

Every few weeks or so there’s an extremely long-winded contrarian NBA take published here. Wastes of thousands of words just to get lost up the authors’ own asses trying to sell a wrong opinion as an obvious fact.

Yep. Like Yogi Berra once said, “It ain’t started until it’s started.” And for now this is just a team with 2 really good players, one of whom is will turn 35 next season following a year of injuries. And Davis, great as he is, has never had to play for a team of any real consequence so we’ll have to see how he does…

It’s amazing how consistently Deadspin has been wrong about the NBA. Just off the top of my head, they criticized the Porzingis draft pick, called the Sixers rebuild a failure, ripped the Toronto Raptors multiple times on their way to a championship, and wanted the Pelicans to accept far less for Anthony Davis than…

This is what you get when you go outside the box and let Werner Herzog try color announcing.

Earth is dying because it's tired of the Mets playing on it. 

Who’s gonna tell him that even if we solve climate change, the sun will ultimately die out. 😢 

“Ten million years from now, when then sun burns out and the Earth is just a frozen iceball hurtling through space, nobody’s going to care whether or not I got this guy out.”

Around The Horn seems to be the lone holdout on ESPN channels where guests/hosts can get away with being critical of something connected to the network. Reali et al., often says things that are at odds with the decidedly-conservative slant the network seems to be leaning towards. I get that Gutierrez is talking…

I hope Tyson Fury gets punched in the balls so fucking hard.

I can’t imagine how tough that must be, and the strength it must take, but it looks like he's got it to spare. I’m glad that he has support from his colleagues. Good words at the end. Never let anybody define who you are.

Fuck, just in time for the release of the new Ford Bronco.

When there's no more room in hell, the dead will go online. 

B-b-b-but, you just don’t understand! You don’t know how hard their jobs are! You cannot possibly understand what these brave men go through, every day! They never know whether they’ll be coming home again, so they HAVE to beat their wives, every chance they get, to let off steam! Otherwise, they’ll have to shoot…

“I’m not your friend, buddy!”

Do we know, for a fact, that Drake *didn’t* plant those bombs on those tankers? No, no we do not.

I actually want to see this go to court just for the opportunity to see the defence present 17000 witnesses on the stand each calling out the cop’s unnecessary and embarrassing aggression.

“It’s not something we wanted to have happen. It didn’t have to go this route,” says spokesperson for sheriff’s office that has chosen to make this happen by going this route.