When even Gronk is smart enough to retire, it’s hard to hold a grudge against Andrew Luck

He looks like Tony Robbins had surgery in an attempt to look more like Casey Affleck.

Don’t you have more important things to do? Like throwing bananas at black soccer players?

These Russian bots are everywhere now

Rolled my eyes so hard I saw my own brain.

His advice: Get a federal permit to kill one of the vultures, then hang it in a tree or other spot where other vultures can see it for miles around.

The timing of the flag throw, though, looks much more likely to have been triggered by the final tussle, not the 50-yard-line contact.

“No.”—The Ghost of Huey Long

“Did someone say three legged race?”

The ITU cited a rule that penalizes athletes who cook up a “contrived tie situation,”

In the movie Cast Away, Tom Hanks spends four years on an island....alone. When he returns to civilization, his estranged wife notes “We got a football team now.”

“Do or do not, or there is no triathlon.”

The commercial in the comments is AMAZING

With a little luck, one day he’ll put up numbers good and consistent enough that when he’s due a big contract no one will sign him for most of the offseason!

Also I would like to own a hat

Because she’s chained up in his basement 

This is the old man I strive to become.  Has empathy, but not without enjoying the absurdity of life. Also I would like to own a hat

“Behind every great man in a fight, is his girlfriend squawking like a crow with laryngitis.”

Yeah, that last sentence was straight trash.

“You’re a loser. I’m a winner”