Will somebody please call Leo and tell him not to cast white actors in the roles of the brothers?

I mean...he’s a fuck-boi, that’s what he does. You gonna blame the dog for barking?

Yes. Also, Tyga is gross.

I think the fact that it’s an unemployed, broke-ass, leech has the nerve to pull some incestuous fuck-boy shit to the girl paying his car note.

It seems to escape some people (male) that sisters/twins in a threesome is incest. So totally NOT hot for them or most of the known world (female). Guys are simply disgusting.

Doesn’t that make you want to retch? Of course it does. You’re human!

it’s been impossible for me to collect enough menstrual blood to make my signature cocktail

Got married in 2016. Eventually, I just started answering every question with, “We’re doing a Clockwork Orange theme.”

Oh my god my absolute least favorite daily activity is when friends/family/colleagues inevitably ask me how wedding planning is going and/or if I am “so excited.” Excited about what... tallying up the ungodly amount of dollars that are being spent on a party friends and family have assured us we have to have?…

Also got married in 2005 and you couldn’t pay me to do it again. It seems so fussy now compared to the good ol’ aughts.

I had a wedding last summer and lots of people wanted to know colors and shit, it was super irritating. Plus, when people want to “help” it’s usually by asking you what YOU want. The best helper I had was my friend who announced she was taking care of our cake as a present, she literally only asked me a) what kind…

You could just go “It’s a surprise!” and cackle while tenting your fingers when people ask that.

I am wedding planning for 2017 and I am also sick of these trends. I only get my period every 2 months so it’s been impossible for me to collect enough menstrual blood to make my signature cocktail. 

I don’t really understand how protecting her kids includes issuing a bunch of press releases and making this as public as possible.

I don’t think they can really read.

Can someone PLEASE give one of these Jenner spawn an education or at least a book? Something??

It’s basically this:

We may not know what happened, but we do know that Angelina made this as public as possible on the very first day and has been issuing press releases ever since. If she cared about the kids she wouldn’t be waging this divorce war in such a public way.

My teenage sister does that - she takes instagrams of her polaroids. She wears rugby sweaters and velvet chokers, she knows all the words to *NSYNC songs because it’s cool and ironic. Sometimes I just want to shake her and scream ‘LIVE IN THE NOW, GIRL, THE FUTURE IS GREAT’ but what can you do. Youths.

I just now got home and my Star Magazine was in the mail box (go ahead and judge 2016 sucks I don’t care). Anyhoo, I kind of would be okay if it’s true that Brad knocked up Kate Hudson (cover story). Count Angeluca could maybe use a little petard hoist in her life.