And despite your corporate overlords telling you to stick to sports, I hope Deadspin never does because

and I can’t emphasize this enough

I come to Deadspin BECAUSE YOU DON’T JUST STICK TO SPORTS

You only have yourself to blame for goofing off with the volume on. Come on, it's procrastinating at work 101. 

Ghosts are an upgrade from Sanchez seeing the Kraken.

This is no worse than Josh Allen seeing spooks.

Username/comment synergy is always greatly appreciated.

Darnold: Shh! Listen! I can hear the ghosts now too.

All this talk of rocket balls can really bring a guy down.

What about rebranding each team as Homeboys / Awayboys, respectively, and inviting Dan Cortese to throw out the first pitch to Bill Bellamy?

Let’s just steal the coin flip from the NFL: Home team gets to call it, and winning team gets to choose rocket balls for the evening or the DH.

It’s startling how similar the Eagles are to the Phillies this year.

Dallas has yet to beat a good team this season.

Rivers brought all of his kids to the game.

His only thought is “how contrarian can I be today?” To stand out as That Guy in Philadelphia media is no small feat.

He has absolutely no redeeming qualities as a writer. At all. Its as if his writing is just a bunch of sentences thrown together as he thinks them up with no thought to coherence and no editing.  I can’t stand him.

This. It’s absolutely amazing to me considering all of the layoffs in Philadelphia media the past few years that this absolute hack still has a writing job. He’s even worse than Eskin, and that’s saying a whole lot because Eskin is absolute garbage. 

Marcus Hayes is the Philadelphia newspaper equivalent of fellow local irritant Howard Eskin: an annoying blowhard who makes himself the story with staggeringly confrontational hot taeks. He is THAT GUY. There are enough good writers around here that you can just avoid him altogether. He lives for your rage. Don’t…

I find it crazy that people will splurge for the bidet but not get the one with a lovely drier attachment on it. Clean as a whistle and nice dried buns, I swear it’s like the 3 seashells in real life.